Memory of a dream
by KarumA-chan
Summary: CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN: Shinn is shot down by Freedom and loses his memory. But the youth holds a darker past than Athrun and Kira could imagine, Dullindal's plan unfolds but will Athrun be able to keep Shinn save? later on ShinnxAthrun
1. Prologue

**Gundam Seed Destiny: Memory of a dream****  
Chapter: Prologue****  
Writer: Karuma-chan/KarumA****  
Don't own  
This fanfic is set after episode 42**

Time for a rewrite!

* * *

A soft beeping sound filled the quiet room, one person lying on bed while another sat beside him. Shinn Asuka had been injured heavily and now lay there, one eye bandaged as the other slowly opened as consciousness seeped away the darkness that clouded his presence.

He could feel something and see that something was covering one eye, it was his right, and his headache didn't make things any better either. He could make out words somewhere in the distance, but couldn't figure out what they meant or who it was that was talking to him.

Next to him sat someone he knew though, Athrun Zala was waiting patiently for him to wake up. He waited and took this time to think, many things had happened and his mind was still set on the battle which had just occurred, the battle in which Shinn was injured and non of his troops made effort to get him out, he wasn't angry with Shinn being here, not even after Kira was almost killed by him, no Shinn was like himself a victim.

His thoughts were shook when he felt something move and he noticed how one eye slowly fluttered open and how an arm tried to move.

"Shinn..." he said shocked as he noticed the dull and battered expression.  
It took Shinn several seconds to respond to him. "Who are... you?"


	2. Chapter 1

**Gundam Seed Destiny: Memory of a dream****  
Chapter: 1  
Writer: Karuma-chan****/KarumA  
****Don't own  
This fanfic is set after episode 42**

* * *

"Who are... you?" Athrun could only look back with disbelief as Shinn tried to sit up, with a painful groan however he lay back down again.

* * *

**Orb waters, 1 week prior:**  
Athrun Zala, now wearing his piloting uniform and sitting inside the unit he hadn't fought with since a long time, was being raised into the launching bay to join in on the battle that was waging outside. The battle of Orb: in which many lives were being lost because of a horrible mistake.

He wasn't all too certain about himself, he wasn't sure if he could cope with his still unhealed injuries but as he saw the blue sky up ahead at the end of the launch pad he thought of Meyrin.

'_I'm okay, please don't leave me...'_

His determination returned and he sighed deeply as he rethought his strategy and battle plan.

"Athrun Zala, Justice, Heading out!"

He could feel the acceleration and once outside he could clearly see what devastation had been brought down on Orb. Orb military was losing against the mass force of ZAFT and the 3 units send out by Lacuss Clyne were one of the few that gave Orb a winning chance.

* * *

**Minerva bridge:**  
"Incoming object launched from Archangel!"

"Another?!"

"It's... Justice!" looking up Gladyss realised who the pilot of this unit was, her eyes narrowed as she tried to figure out what was going on.

* * *

**On the battlefield:**  
The two Gundam units Freedom and Destiny were in duel, both units clashing against each other, flying apart and clashing again before repeating this cycle. Once separated again Shinn fired Destiny's leg riffle which was countered by Freedom's lasers. It was during this that he heard a voice of someone he thought had died not so long ago.

"Stop, Shinn!" his eyes widened at that voice and he spun the unit, dodging the incoming fire as he did, to see Justice flying towards him and Kira. He was shocked.

"Athrun! But you're... I... impossible!" shocked and at loss of words.

"Shinn listen to me, stop fighting! There is something happe-" he was however interrupted by incoming fire from Legend. Athrun evaded but soon found himself occupied with the enemy unit who quickly contacted his confused comrade.

"Shinn don't listen to him, the traitor may have survived, but this time for sure!" Shinn remembered the event, he remembered stabbing the Zaku unit both Athrun and Meyrin tried to flee in, but Athrun tried to make contact with Shinn again.

"Shinn!" he was confused now and had actually stopped dead in his tracks not knowing what to do.

"Shinn, remember what we are fighting for! The chairman wants to make a peaceful world, but for that to happen we need to find Djibril! Remember they were the ones who started this war!" he thought of Stellar, poor but beautiful Stellar who was never given the chance to actually live. He remembered how she died when he tried to save her, how Freedom had killed her and how she had suffered in the Minerva medical facility before he gave her up. Stellar was giving him a reason to fight.

"Orb sealed its own fate when it took in Djibril! We have to stop them to end this war..." he said with cold words, but before he could take action Freedom charged to Legend and in a quick draw slayed the unit in pieces with a pulled blade. Seeing the unit fall down into the ocean only made him relive the pain he felt back then.

"Rey..." how Freedom's blades cut forward into the Destroyer when he tried to save Stellar and how she then died in his arms when he could've saved her. There was an explosion and this is what made him snap. He screamed and the back wings of Destiny clapped open as he drew his blade and with it he charged forward to Freedom, who dodged it just barely.

* * *

**Minerva:**  
Back on the ship Lunamaria also saw how Legend feel down into the ocean, she inhaled deeply and started walking to the bridge.

"Captain we've lost signal from legend. Rey is-" Gladyss turned to the messenger to respond as the doors to the bridge opened and Lunamaria walked inside.

"Captain, I'm going out" Everyone turned and looked at her.

"Lunamaria..."

"You can't stop me, Rey is..."

"I understand, but you are not to engage into Destiny's battles. Find Rey, quickly!"

"Understood!" and with that she readied himself, she had to find Rey even if that was the only thing she could do.

"Core splendor, launch when ready" Lunamaria clenched her teeth at the thought that Shinn wasn't going to save her if she got in trouble this time. She was going in alone now.

'_Lunamaria, you will remain here. If you distract Shinn, he will lose. You're a hindrance for him right now'_

"Lunamaria Hawke, Core splendor. I'm heading out!" she launched, unknowing that Athrun had returned, the 4 parts quickly assembled making the Impulse Gundam and the back engines flared as the raced down over the water surface. Minerva was also still in battle, Archangel's Isolde had fired and they were barely able to evade it, the left side of the ship was damaged critically.

* * *

Elsewhere on the battlefield Shinn had completely lost it, focussing his attacks only on Freedom and ignoring anything else. Athrun tried to get through to him but without avail, Shinn kept on ignoring his incoming requests, he had gone berserk. Without much choice Freedom fired its main guns, all targeted on the Destiny unit, though to Kira's disbelief he dodged them and charged forward with the massive blade. Kira backed away to evade it but Shinn slammed forward against Freedom, knocking it down to the ocean with massive force.

"Kira!" Justice took its pistol and fired several shots to try and get Shinn's attention, to try and make him stop this insane foolishness. "Shinn, stop! Kira is-" he tried to say innocent.

"Innocent?! And what would that make of Stellar?!" the tone of his voice frightened him, there was so much rage. Destiny turned to him and Athrun could feel a killing intent, he could feel such grudge that he himself felt the urge the run away, but he couldn't and he wouldn't.

"Don't take me for a fool!" Were the last words spoken before Shinn decided to charge towards him, he was struck with such force that Justice's shield was smashed to pieces and he was now losing altitude and glided over the water surface as Shinn threw the two back blades towards him, it would be almost impossible to dodge them.

* * *

Down below Lunamaria was getting closer to the floating debris that once was the Legend Gundam, looking up she could see Shinn fight. Shinn scared her when he fought, she was glad he was still on her side. Her alarms went off and Lunamaria looked up seeing Freedom crashing down towards her, she quickly moved out of the way as the unit crashed down into the ocean and quickly continued her search for Rey with the hope she wasn't about to get involved. Lucky enough she found the chess piece, its cockpit still intact and unopened and she grabbed it and lifted it out of the water. Looking up she tried to find Shinn again, but when she saw Justice near him her eyes widened.

"Is that... Justice?!" she watched as 2 rotating blades closed in on the unit and how Freedom rose up from the ocean in front of it. Freedom, with guns drawn it fired twice, one set fired at the rotating blades as the other fired at Destiny. The blasts were stopped by the shield but it was pushed back by its firepower as one of the blades flung back towards the unit. The alarms went off but evasion was impossible now, when Shinn looked up again the blade slashed in his cockpit causing a chain reaction inside as an explosion occurred not far from his head, the screens exploded loudly, knocking the glass out of his helmet and another flung another large piece directly in his eye, piercing through the cracked helmet glass. He screamed as blood poured down the wound and grabbed the sides of his helmet.

Freedom charged forward again, ignoring the damage and cut off Destiny's arms, legs and head. The pieces fell down into the water below and all Luna could do was watch, she couldn't believe what she was seeing right now.

"Shinn..." the idea of Shinn being defeated was allowing tears to flow down her cheeks. Shinn couldn't be defeated, it couldn't be happening. Her alarms went off again and she was forced to dodge incoming fire from Orb units. Unwillingly she turned and made her way back to base.

"Lost signal to Destiny, unbelievable..." Gladyss' eyes widened to this call, she turned to her battle announcer in disbelief.

"What?"

* * *

**Orb Military National Defence Headquarters:**  
Cagalli was having it tough, with Orb military losing outside and no luck evacuating Orb's civilians she was losing fate, that was until Lacuss contacted her.

"Cagalli-san?" Cagalli looked up at the screen. "Lacuss?"

"Cagalli, I think it is time to tell then, don't you think?" she nodded in response. "Remember, put your mind to it and carry it out completely" with that the message ended.

"Get me communication with chairman Dullindal, now!" within several minutes a call opened and the chairman now looked at her from the screen.

"Stop this fight, right now!" she pleaded. "Why should we stop attacking? Do you surrender?"

"We... Everyone here has made mistakes, even I admit that didn't rightfully do my duties, but by my father's name we are doing everything we can to stop Djibril!" tears now ran down her face. "He did so many terrible things, yet he made the people here believe that the right thing to do was join the EAF forces, I couldn't do anything to stop them... I beg you to stop, please!"

"I understand" that was all the chairman said before he closed the link.

* * *

After Lunamaria landed with Legend's cockpit and the medical team pulled out an unconscious Rey she noticed how everyone was gathered near one of the screens, there was something going on and she quickly got out of her cockpit and made her way through the crowd.

"- I repeat from trusting sources we've found out that Djibril was making use of Orb's government forces, they are doing their best to find Djibrill themselves and because of their surrender ZAFT will stop all military activity on Orb-" she froze.

* * *

Back in the battlefield both units noticed ZAFT's retreat, Justice still levitated and Athrun still couldn't believe that Shinn had been defeated.

"Athrun, let's go back" Athrun nodded and turned to leave but when his back engines started firing up he saw something below in the water, parts from Destiny were slowly floating upwards and as Kira turned around to check on his friend he saw that Athrun was lifting something from the water.

"Athrun..." Justice gained on him and held the remains of a cockpit as it accelerated towards the Archangel.


	3. Chapter 2

**Gundam Seed Destiny: Memory of a dream****  
Chapter:2  
Writer: Karuma-chan****/KarumA****  
Don't own  
This fanfic is set after episode 42**

* * *

"Athrun!"

It can be strange the way people act, it can be strange to know that a certain action can cause the current line of reaction to breach and reform anew. A new path and a new destiny, Kira knew at this moment that there would be trouble or at least hardship. He ran forward to his fallen friend, he knew Athrun was in pain but couldn't see why he was pushing himself as far as now. His hands removed the helmet and a strain of blood made its way down Athrun's pain written face, he became worried and opened his suit, just like he feared: the old wounds had reopened thanks to Athrun's fighting spirit.

A stretcher came in moments later, medical staff helped him on the stretcher and raised him up from the ground. A hand grabbed Kira's wrist and with pleading eyes Athrun whimpered to him.

"Kira... please... get him..." Kira knew what he meant and as Athrun was carried away he turned around and looked at the battered cockpit of what was once Destiny.

* * *

It took time to safely remove all parts of the front side of the cockpit, all systems had been jammed because of the short circuiting and so now a group of 6 engineers were pulling of metal scraps and tearing open each crack they could find with either their bare hands or with tools. It smelled like metal and oil as they slowly made their way through each crushed layer of scrap metal without knowing what was going on inside. Was the pilot dead, was he still alive? Kira could only hope for Athrun that it was the last but wondered if the pilot was still in one piece. Another loud metallic clank and a signal was given to pull out the front, with 5 people they pulled off the front hatch by hand and it crashed down on the ground rather loudly. None of them said a word as they looked inside. There he was, the pilot of the Destiny Gundam hanging his head while lying slumped in his seat. His hands were still on the controls and his body looked battered, Kira noticed something sticking out of the helmet and saw that there was blood dripping down on his leg. The sight shocked him and even though he was standing there with his arms crossed he couldn't help but pinch himself so that he was certain that this was real and not a dream. There was a teenager, little younger than himself, lying in a breached cockpit on the edge of death, if he wasn't dead already that was.

Carefully the pilot was lifted out and put on a stretcher, still Kira stood there with arms crossed. The helmet had a thick piece of glass pierced through the front, blood remains stuck to the cracked edges. He couldn't see through the helmet's glass, but he could overlook how his chest was vaguely rising up and down. The symbol of Faith, half covered with blood was still rising and falling.

* * *

Present time:

Many things happened after that, the fighting had stopped and ZAFT had retreated for now and slowly things were getting rebuild. The dead were buried and the wreckages demolished to make place for things new. Djibril was never found, somehow that awful man had still managed to escape and in between all of this Cagalli finally found time to board the Archangel after hearing about her husband's injury. She now walked down the hallway to the medical facility and opened the door, there next to him she saw someone she didn't expect to see.

Cagalli looked Shinn in his eyes and his presence started to enrage her. The other however looked back at her rather startled.

"You... What are YOU doing here?! After all the pain and suffering you've brought to this country! How dare you show your face here!" she yelled and pushed Athrun out of the way. Cagalli grabbed Shinn by his collar and pulled him up, ignoring the pain that escaped the other youth's mouth.

"Cagalli, let him go! Cagalli!" Athrun tried his best to calm her down and she released him and Shinn fell back on the bed rather harshly. She now turned to him instead.

"Are you picking sides, for God's sake you know what he's done, don't you! Why is he here?!"

"Cagalli, listen to me. Something's off with him, be quiet. Please" Cagalli stopped talking and Athrun walked back to the bed. Shinn's breaths were heavy and he looked at Athrun with a light sense of fear as the man sat down next to him.

"Are you alright?" Athrun asked with a gentle smile.

"My chest hurts... and so does my head..." the young teen answered while rubbing the palm of his right hand over his face covering bandages.

"Athrun, what are you doing?" Athrun ignored Cagalli and gentle grabbed Shinn's hand.

"Don't rub your eye..." Shinn looked at him awkwardly but took his advice. "Do you know where you are, Shinn?"

The younger teen blinked.  
"Shinn...?" he mumbled. "Is that my name?" He chose his words carefully as if afraid that what he would say would only increase the hostility towards him. He looked at Athrun, this man had been the only person that hadn't yelled at him so far, he looked at him seeking for answers. Like a confused child, lost or un able to solve a simple problem.

Athrun nodded and answered with a simple yes as Cagalli looked at them with surprise. "Memory loss?"

Athrun turned to her. "Could be, after all he took a very heavy blow"  
Cagalli looked at Shinn again. Athrun had been right, the way Shinn looked at her it was as if there was something missing. His reaction would be different and as she looked at him she could recognise something. Perhaps fear, perhaps it was bemusement. But in the end Cagalli felt one thing: pity.

"Shinn..." the door opened again, Meyrin was standing in the doorway and upon seeing the injured pilot she nearly dropped the food tray she was carrying. Cagalli quickly walked towards her and took the tray from her hands, before anything bad could happen. Kira was standing behind Meyrin and guided her to a chair where she could sit and calm down, after all Meyrin was still on edge when it came to Shinn. The girl still had nightmares of how he tried to kill her and Athrun.

Kira looked at him now, his eyes narrowed and his mind on guard and as their eyes met the other teen could sense distrust. Shinn looked at the two newcomers, he was unsure what to think of them.

"It's alright. Here just eat, you must be hungry" Cagalli drew his attention again when she placed the food tray on his lap and raised a spoonful of what seemed to be mashed potatoes with peas. Kira looked at Athrun now, displeased by his sister's behaviour, Athrun noticed but quickly added.

"Don't worry Kira. Even though it might be a bad thing, right now he doesn't seem to remember anything" the tension on Kira's shoulders released and he sighed as Cagalli left towards the door.

"I'll inform the captain" Kira nodded to her and now Meyrin had taken place next to Shinn, who was stuffing his mouth with food. None of them said anything about bad manners, after all Shinn had been unconscious for a week, his stomach was still aching for normal food despite the amount he was given through a tube.

"Shinn...?" Meyrin called out, still careful and still on edge. He looked up at her though, the spoon still in his mouth. "Don't you remember anything?"

Slowly he took out the spoon, his eyebrows knitted together as he tried to concentrate. In the end however he shook his head and smiled at her as he continued eating his serving. Everyone looked at him now, Athrun was in fact amazed by this sudden change of attitude as he only knew Shinn as someone who was always bend on revenge and getting better, during his stay on the Minerva he had never really seen Shinn this relaxed and perhaps even happy. His thoughts were shook though when the young teen started a coughing fit, Athrun was about ready to stand but Kira was already by his side giving him soft claps on his back until he stopped coughing. As Kira looked into those eyes he realised that the Shinn in front of him was still nothing more but an innocent and confused young man. The pilot he hated was no longer the man he knew and with that he knew that holding a grudge against someone who was un able to make out why people would hate him was something useless. So now Kira smiled at him and raised his hand.

"I think introductions should be in order, my name is Kira." Carefully Shinn took his hand, Kira's grip tightened and he shook Shinn's hand before turning to the people around him. "That there is Athrun and this is Meyrin. The blonde girl who just left the room is called Cagalli"

It was bedazzling the way things went now, Shinn was unsure of what his response should be, but the way he was treated now was better than a moment ago and in fact he was quite happy to be introduced. He smiled and nodded to the new faces.

"A pleasure meeting you, my name is Shinn"


	4. Chapter 3

**Gundam Seed Destiny:  
Memory of a dream****  
Chapter: 3  
Writer: Karuma-chan****/KarumA  
****Don't own  
This fanfic is set after episode 42**

* * *

The crowd that had previously gathered in his room had left shortly after one by one, as a patient Kira thought it was better for Shinn to take it easy and to not get overwhelmed by everything and everyone around him and so now Shinn was alone again. Athrun had left lastly and had whispered to him that everything would be alright, but what confused him about it was that he didn't understand why Athrun would say something like that. Had he done something bad? Was there something wrong with him being here? These thoughts plagued his mind, he wanted to know more, learn more and hear more tales of his new found friends. All this silence was killing him and all he could do was wait. The chain that hung around his wrist disallowed him from discovering whatever place he was in and so all he could do was wait. And with his back against the wall Shinn could only stare at his toes or the empty bed in front of him as he waited just a little more.

Murrue, captain of the Archangel, was now walking through the hallways to the ship's medical facility. She would've come during the afternoon but her schedule, like Cagalli's, was filled till the top and only now did she really have time to hear out the other pilot. Shinn Asuka, famed ZAFT ace pilot. The kid had a reputation and she had seen him on the battlefield before, he was surely not one to underestimate and because of this she knew to be more cautious than the rest of the crew. After all she was their captain, in the end it would be her decision to keep the teen where he was or to drop him off at the nearest ZAFT military station. The only thing getting in her way was his amnesia, but she was still to figure out whether or not it was actual amnesia or if he was faking it and would perhaps attack them from within their own ship. Athrun seemed the be the only one having high hopes for him and even though Athrun deserved some credit it wasn't his decision that would decide Shinn's fate.

She took a deep breath and slid her card through the lock slide, something beeped and the door opened. Sickbay was completely empty all beside the one bed where Shinn was sitting on, his back against the wall and his knees pulled up, his arms were resting on them and he now looked at her. She noticed his bandaged eye and the IV that still stuck in his arm. Murrue smiled kindly, grabbed a crutch and rolled it closer to the teen before sitting down with a mass of papers in her hands. Shinn noticed his picture on one of them and she tried to observe him, but so far there was nothing suspicious, she sighed and they started to talk.

* * *

The rumour that Athrun had taken back a ZAFT pilot had spread like wildfire, of course it wasn't much of a secret since the entire event took place in public but still there were many people interested in hearing Athrun's story and others couldn't believe their ears when they heard about it. Miriallia was one of those curious people and she found herself in luck when she walked in the cafeteria. Athrun, now wearing an EAF uniform with still visible bandages, was sitting together with Kira and both were eating their diner. Miriallia quickly grabbed a plate and got her food before sitting next to Athrun.

"I heard you brought back a ZAFT present?" she said directly, there was no point in trying to sound polite in these matters, after all she had known Athrun for some time now. Athrun's silence confirmed the rumours and this only made the girl more thrilled than she already was.

"You did?! Ooh whow, then you're in for it big time Athrun, I heard that Murrue was discussing with the rest of the crew that she would drop him off at a nearby ZAFT military base. I mean she was pissed!" Athrun coughed and nearly choked in the rice he was eating, he looked at Miriallia and responded rather panicked.

"She going to do what?!"

"Well, it is an option. But-" before she could finish her sentence Athrun jumped to his feet and ran in the direction of the medical facility. Once arriving at sickbay he noticed that the door was shut and firstly he decided to catch his breath but curiosity got the best of him and so he went on his knees and pressed one ear against the small crack between the doorpost and the door itself.

"Athrun, you know better than that..." Kira sighed when Athrun raised one hand and motioned him to be quiet however the door slid open and something kicked Athrun harshly aside. An angry Murrue now walked down the hallway with heavy footsteps, a key swinging around a finger and her eyebrows knitted together and she cursed silently as she walked away, both Athrun and Kira looked at her confused but quickly turned their gazes to the inside of the room. Shinn was sitting there, legs crossed and being as confused as they were.

Athrun got up and walked inside.

"What happened?" he asked as he sat down next to the teen.

"I don't know... she started asking me all these tough questions... I didn't know any of them. And then she got pissed off or something and left the room" Athrun sighed.

"Did she mention anything about dropping you off or leaving the ship?"

"No, she did remove that annoying chain from my wrist" His hand was still rubbing the sore wrist where the cuff used to be and Athrun was relieved After a moment he even started laughing.


	5. Chapter 4

**Gundam Seed Destiny: Memory of a dream****  
Chapter: 4  
Writer: Karuma-chan****/KarumA****  
Don't own  
This fanfic is set after episode 42**

* * *

It was night-time now, a couple days after Murrue had unchained him and had declared him not to be a threat to the ship's personnel. The then cranky woman was now a lot nicer to him and had actually explained that he was right now on a giant ship, he knew the terms and he could picture what the ship looked like, somehow that part of his brain still functioned however he didn't know why he knew those things and no one was around to explain it for him. Athrun had left a short while ago, he was almost fully healed now and only required a renewal every once in a while. Shinn however was still stuck in the regular spot, a thick bandage still around his head and covering his right eye. Athrun had told him that he had been injured, yet he couldn't remember where or why, Athrun turned silent every time he asked him about it and now he had left him again.

He missed his presence, it was too silent and too lonely without company. Shinn lay down on his back and stared at the ceiling, his arms crossed and behind his head. He wondered when he could leave this room and explore the rest of the ship. He had been to some places: the cafeteria, the showers and he had even seen where Kira and Athrun slept because he was curious about where the crew slept at night since I hardly heard anyone pass by during the night hours. This only made him realise more and more that this ship was bigger than he expected and so his curiosity rose and his urge to explore became ever greater, but now like every day he was back in bed staring at the ceiling, wondering about himself and the holes in his mind. Again he stared at the empty bed on the other side of the sickbay, another hospital bed for another patient and somehow it felt incomplete with it being unoccupied, somehow it felt familiar having someone else around during the night.

The door slid open and automatically Shinn sat up to see who it was. Kira stood in the doorway and smiled at him.

"I just came by to say goodnight" he said, Shinn was a little disappointed that Kira was going to leave again.

"Goodnight, Kira"

"Goodnight, Shinn" he said and walked away, several second later the door closed automatically again and locked itself.

Shinn lay back down and while staring up at the ceiling he spoke out his own name. Shinn. There were probably a lot of people in this world who called him by that name and as he stared at the ceiling he could hear voices call out to him. At first they were familiar, like Kira calling him or Athrun but after a while those voices changed to some that he couldn't recognise anymore and as he tried to remember whose voices he was hearing he only heard more and more, some happy, some sad and eventually some that sounded in pain. It scared the hell out of him.

"Stop it..." he whispered with his back now against the wall and his hands covering his ears as if he was trying to block out these sounds. His visible eye was spread open and alert as he saw a figure in his mind dancing.

_'Shinn' _a female voice said, it sounded like such a sad voice. _'Shinn... protect m-'_

He then saw red, red like blood. His mind thought of blood and as scared as he was he flung himself off the bed, bashed the button near the door and dashed out.

* * *

Somewhere in the back of his mind Athrun recognised banging. He slowly opened his eyes and peered into the dark as this sound didn't seem to come to an end. he groaned as he forced himself out of bed and dragged himself towards the door, his fingers passing over some buttons before the door slid open. Shinn was standing in front of his door, one hand rubbing his left eye and he seemed to be crying. Athrun was stunned by this sight, foremost because he had never seen Shinn in a position like this.

"Shinn, what is it?" he raised his hand to the other teen's shoulder and carefully invited him in an embrace, Shinn took it without hesitation and now pressed his face further against Athrun's chest as the elder rubbed small circles on his back to try and calm him down.

"I... I don't want to be alone..." Shinn whispered and Athrun sighed before letting him inside his room.


	6. Dew

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

Ok the words in the last memory part were from Stellar .

If you don't believe me just recap the episode that she dies and the one after that where Shinn puts her in that lake, I still shed a tear when watching both...

Well on with the show

**Reaction to the LONG review :**

I didn't mean to give Kira Shinn a hating attitude, but a bit not trusting

I wanted Kira to not trust Shinn in the beginning since they don't know each other and because Shinn attacked Kira multiple times,

it should give anyone a reason to not trust another one in the start, I wanted Kira to not let his guard down for Shinn in the beginning,

but I will go further into their relationship and the one between Athrun and Shinn, it can make things more dramatic if they really became friends in the end

Sorry to have given you that kind of view though, ill put some notes in in the start of the chapter about the previous chapter developments between characters

**-Food area- : wtf is that part of the ship called o.O; can anyone let me know!**

**- And can someone tell me the names of the Archangel crew? Specially that black guy who leads the mechanics in the mecha room**

**-and also the voice heard in the previous chapter is Stellars voice**

* * *

Athrun moaned, the alarm was bleeping in his room as he reached out for the alarm clock next to his bed, 

slamming down his fist on it

He opened his eyes and looked at the time on the clock

His eyes widening as he saw WHAT time it actually was...

It was 1 AM now, that stupid alarm must have been on for like hours and he had slept through it until now

Athrun tried to get up, eyes still half closed

But at his attempt of getting out of bed like normal he fell out of his bed,

his legs still stuck on something in his bed, upper body hanging over his bedside and lying on the ground

He quickly turned around and saw Shinn clinging on his legs, he seemed to still b asleep

Athrun's eyes widened though, what the hell was Shinn doing in his bed!

Then it came back to him

* * *

As the door slid closed behind them Athrun yawned, 

it was now completely dark in the room all except for the alarm clock on Athrun's nightstand

Athrun walked ahead, soon followed by loud noises of Shinn not being able to get his way around,

crashing into things and almost falling over Athrun's shoes

Athrun yawned again and with sleepy eyes turned around,

he grapped Shinn's hand and pulled him through the room, avoiding all the stuff lying on the ground

When Athrun had come to his bed he let go of Shinn's hand and crawled back in under the covers

"G'night Shinn..."

* * *

Then it came to him... 

'No extra bed...'

Athrun silently laughed to himself, he had forgotten that this room didn't have an extra bed at all

He must have forgotten that...

* * *

Several minutes later Athrun's door slid open, 

just a little bit actually, his head peaked around the corner and he sighed of relief...

The hallway was empty

He quickly got out and the door slid closed behind him

On a fast pass he walked to the cafeteria

He walked in and sighed, believing it to be empty,

he opened his eyes again seeing that Kira was still there, eating his breakfast... or lunch

Kira was looking at him awkward

"K...Kira..."

Athrun quickly laughed

"G.. Good morning"

"Good morning Athrun"

* * *

Athrun put his plate down on the table, seating across Kira 

He grapped his cup of coffee and took a sip of it

"Athurn, this morning I came to the medical facility with Shinn's lunch..."

Athrun almost choked in his coffee now, he put the cup down quickly and started to cough a couple of times

"He was gone, do you might know where he is?"

* * *

Athurns door slid open again, 

this time Shinn was walking out, he stretched himself and yawned

He started to walk down the hallway to the elevator,

stepping inside when the doors slid open, yawning again as they closed

* * *

Athrun snickered, in his current situation he didn't know what to say to Kira... 

He was afraid Kira would laugh at him or think of something stupid about him

"Well you see..."

just as he tried to finish Murrue walked in

"There you are Athrun, we've been trying to get to you for 2 hours now..."

Athrun stood up, as did Kira and they greeted her

"Sorry captain, I slept through it all..."

"No problem Athrun, but I would like to have a word with you, maybe you can help us out with something"

Athrun looked surprised, but quickly nodded in acceptance

* * *

The elevator doors reopened again, Shinn walked out as they closed behind him 

Lost, that was what he currently was

He had never been on such a big ship before... let alone never in an area like this

Many people were working on things, big things!

Shinn tried to remember what they were called...

Then it came back to him, the things the people were working on were mobile suits

Though they didn't look like any ordinary mobile suits as he remembered

Shinn walked across the mecha's looking up and staring at them from time to time

Some were already repaired it seemed, other were still half in pieces

As he walked across the machines he saw several people in particular having a discussion

As he walked closer to them an older tanned man looked at him

He quickly walked up to him and gave him a back pat or slap as Shinn would think,

he was slammed so hard in the back by him that he almost fell over

"You live! Aah its good to see you up and walking my boy!"

Shinn was a bit to shy to talk though, he also wasn't given the chance to it at all

"You were lucky! Could have been much worse then just your eye..."

Shinn simply nooded

But before he knew it he was given a list and was getting pushed off the ship to the docks

"You don't seem to be busy today, also some fresh air would do you good, do you mind getting us the things on the list, we'd be very thankful you know"

"Bu-"

yet before he could finish he was already standing on land and the door of the entrance was already closed

Shinn looked at the list,

'hair gel, showering crème, several magazines, toothpaste and... tampons?'

Shinn's eyes widened as he read the other things on the list,

sweat dropping he folded it up and walked down the dock

* * *

The doors to the Bridge opened Athrun entered together with Murrue 

They were greeted by non other then Lacus Clyne

"Good morning Athrun, you seemed to have slept nice enough"

in front of her were notes, all lying over a table,

they were the notes she had picked up from her trip in space a several weeks ago

* * *

Shinn sighed as he walked down the streets in one hand a bag with groceries and in the other the list, 

He looked up from his list and up to the hills

Something seemed very familiar to him about this place but he couldn't tell what,

he looked up in the distance to some woods up in the hills behind the buildings he was walking close to

For a moment he stopped, a vague voice was hear able to him again,

this time it wasn't the one he heard last night, these were multiple voices

-Mayu hold on!-

he took time to listen to them, he could hear multiple things at once,

huffing as if the voices seemed out of breath

he stood still in the crowd,

the people that passed looked at him as if there was something wrong with him though,

yet Shinn was standing perfectly still and starring straight at the hill side

-Aah! Mayu's cell phone-

after that he heard something,

an explosion of some kind and flashes of corpses going through his mind he quickly covered his ears and going on his knees,

the noise from the explosion was to loud for him

who were those people he saw, why were they dead

Shinn dropped his grocery bag it was then that a limosine stopped near him and the door opened

"Shinn? What are you doing outside..."

Shinn looked to his left seeing that Cagalli had stepped out of the car,

many orb citizens now stopped walking and starred at her, making a clear way between Shinn and Cagalli

Cagalli saw fear on Shinn's eyes and quickly ran up to him


	7. Fear

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

Hooray ! its weekend!

My new school year has just started and im in my final year now, and yet after one week ife been thrown to death by homework!

And recently ife been thinking a lot about making a Bleach fic ;

I just feel so sorry for Ichigo with all the Vizardness and such

And ife had some great inspiration the last couple of days, I dreamt about this anyway :D

And it fits perfectly in this fiction, hooray!

Also today ife been to my first anime convention, though I was all alone and bored because of my anti- social ness problem,

I have a problem with trusting and knowing what to say against strangers so ife said nothing for the entire day, lol

But I have been gaming a lot with people :D Naruto multi character fighting games and the new Bleach game witch was awesome !

Next time ill take some friends, or beg them to come since I am one of the few that actually likes anime a lot :P

But on with the story!

As you all should know the last memory flashback thingy was from episode 1 when Shinn's younger sister Mayu and his parents died,

though things will get more mysterious from now on XD WHAHAHA!

* * *

The limousine was standing still on the dock right beside Archangel

Cagalli was angry, she was stamping across the bridge leading to the entrance door,

Shinn was following her

Carrying a grocery bag in his hands, he looked depressed though and wasn't even looking on where he was going,

he bumped right into Cagalli when she entered the access code

* * *

moments later they both walked into the armoury hall,

Shinn looked ahead the group of mechanics were all still busy yet the man who gave him the list of things was now walking towards them both smiling but Cagalli wasn't the one who wanted to greet him happily in return

Cagalli tried to slap him but the man grapped her hand in mid air

"Oy oy! No need to do that now"

Cagalli pulled her hand back looking at the man in anger

Shinn just stood behind her, bag in his hands and no expression in his eyes whatsoever

"You could have gone shopping yourself! No need to make an amnesic kid to do that work for you!"

"I just wanted him to get some fresh air, it would've done him well... he hasn't seen land in like weeks!"

Cagalli sighed, calming down she said

"Well don't ever let him do your chores again... got that!"

"Hai, hai, your wish is my command princess... Shinn do you mind bringing those buns up to that platform?"

The man pointed upwards, someone else was waving down at them and this person seemed to be working on the cockpits

Shinn nodded and walked to the elevator platform as he ignored Cagalli's angry tones commanded to the man she had just tried to slap

Shinn sighed as the lift went up to cockpit height and he walked to the mechanics that were working there

* * *

**On the bridge**

****

Athrun was starring at the papers confused,

he started to read some of them but he couldn't find anything that made sense to him

"Gene manipulation..."

Lacuss walked up to him with a small book

"Uhn... and also this"

She handed Athrun the small book, clapping it open on a certain page

Athrun's eyes widened as he started to read

"Destiny Plan?"

* * *

Shinn now with his hands empty,

all the food in the bag and goods were now all taken care off, now walked down the metal platform gazing at the Mobile Suits that stood beside them

From one down at the end the cockpit was open, a mechanic that was working on the hatches of the Unit crawled out

The mechanic sighed as he walked passed Shinn

Shinn didn't notice, he was curious

Shinn checked the platforms he was standing on to see if nobody would be able to see what he was about to do

He crawled through the open hatches of the unit getting to the pilot room

He was amazed to see the many controls this one had,

this one seemed more special then any of the others he had read about in the magazines in Athrun's room

He slowly took place in the pilot seat feeling some strange sensation crawling up from his back

Before he could even blink, strange flashes went through his mind,

he could have sworn them to be real

As if he was in combat with people

Shinn closed his eyes and bent forward, he shook his head, why were these things going through his head?

Athrun had told him that he had amnesia or something like that, but those flashes, the dead people... did he kill them?

Those flashes of combat, was he a soldier of some kind?

Or a terrorist?

He started to mumble to himself

"A.. Athrun... Meyrin..."

Then another flash entered his mind,

of himself screaming for something closing in on another unit stabbing a huge swords right through the centre

A voice screamed through his mind, the voice of someone he knew well

Athrun's voice...

"Shinn!"

Before Shinn knew what he was doing his fingers ran fast over the key board of the unit,

turning it on he quickly pulled the handles as a reaction to the things he saw

Still eyes closed he pulled them back to himself as if defending himself from something and screamed

* * *

The last thing Cagalli remembered doing was arguing with Archangel's main mechanic yet before she could say anything back at him she heard a loud clattering sound,

she spun around trying to see what it was yet before she could do the main mechanic had thrown himself over her and had taken her out of danger

The whole steel platform that they used to get to the cockpits had fallen down, and it had almost landed on top of both of them

From underneath Cagalli saw a unit stepping over them, her eyes widened in fear as she thought of who it might be piloting it

* * *

On the bridge that loud noise trembled through the floors, making it hard to keep balance,

several of the main crew that were on duty now had fallen on the ground by it or were very shaken up

The papers on the table had fallen down on the floor,

a few seconds after the trembling sound Kira had picked up the phone near the captains chair, calling in to the armoury

"What was going on!"

After a short moment of silence and only a mumbling sound hear able from the phone itself Kira's eyes widened he hung up abruptly

Kira wanted to run to the door when Athrun grapped him by his arm

"Kira, what's wrong!"

"It's Shinn...he has taken Freedom"

Athrun's eyes opened up wide,

quickly the two opened the door and made way through the halls,

Murrue took seat on the captain's chair sounding off a code red alert

* * *

In the armoury the mechanics and Cagalli were trying to get themselves to safety

Yet Cagalli was standing in front of Freedom,

arms spread pleading Shinn to stop on whatever had gone into him

"Shinn, STOP THIS! PLEASE!"

Yet Shinn couldn't hear her at all,

the voices in his mind were making him insane at this point and his seed mode activated as the lower elevator doors opened and Athrun and Kira ran in

Athrun quickly ran to Cagalli quickly grapping her as he jumped to save her from being squashed by Freedom,

the both landed behind some metal craters

Kira had ran to the phone,

calling to the bridge yelling them to lock the launch bay at all cost,

yet as he turned around to see what was actually was going on he had to hide behind some metallic cases as flames and explosions passed through the air

Shinn had somehow found out how to fire Freedom's main guns,

he screamed as they hit the large metallic doors that stood in his way and the fresh air outside and to Kira's disbelieve he had been able to make a large hole through the doors

Freedom's engines now roared as it took off, only God knew what would happen

As Kira stood up Athrun had thrown Cagalli into his arms

"Take her to safety! I'm going after Shinn!"

Before Kira could think of what he meant he saw Athrun tackle himself up to the cockpit of Justice

Quickly he and Cagalli ran to the elevators

* * *

omg what you think XD

starts giggling like mad

I'll put up the next chapter tomorrow, im all home alone this weekend so I have tons of time to make it then XD

Remember R&R


	8. Virtual Hell

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

Ok next chapter :D after a good night rest im all ready to get this going again!

And because I have to wait for the subbed version of GSD to complete and for the new subbed Tsubasa Chronicles I decided to start this chapter

**Thank you for reviewing !**

****

And though none of my chapters say it, you all should possibly know that I don't own anything gundam seed like or gundam seed destiny, as if you didn't figure this out already :S

Also Shinn's is just mentally insane and doesn't has his head at reality at the moment

Though not all flashbacks that are in this chapter are from the series, keep that in mind when reading

* * *

Flying slightly above the water surface it seemed like Freedom was going into the unknown 

Shinn didn't know where he was going to

Inside the cockpit he still struggled with the voices in his head, shaking it off trying to get rid of it

But every time more came back in return

From behind Justice was flying up to him

Athrun tried desperately to get into visual contact with Shinn, he was worried about him at the time

Just as he thought he had made contact with him something else happened

In Freedom's cockpit Athrun voice came through the audio speakers

"Shinn, cut it out!"

Shinn's eyes widened, pure anger was emoted on his face, his eyes pressed to slits as tears ran down them

* * *

Back at ORB waters Archangel was taking off, following to the located of Justice and Freedom

They followed the battle on screen

Kira grinded his teeth feeling annoyed that he couldn't help them outside

Cagalli was just worried about Athrun and Lacuss she just watched with Kira's arm around her

* * *

Athrun could hear sobbing and deep breathing through the COM link

Yet before he could response more to him Freedom had spun around firing it's main guns

Justice quickly made a side roll to the left barely dodging it

* * *

"Shinn STOP THIS!"

He yelled through the link, though with no use, no response could he heard expect for the sound of sobbing and anger

* * *

"Shinn STOP THIS!"

**- They are our enemies! Enemies!-**

Shinn shook his head, he didn't know what to trust

**-I was foolish too-**

**-But I won't lose-**

**-That's why Shinn, you too...-**

His breathing became deeper at everything he heard

Yet he still didn't know what he was doing

Freedom charged at Athrun, in both hands a laser blade, ready to attack

"SHINN!"

Justice took hold of his blade as well, on both side laser sprung out and he charged as well

They clashed

**-The EAF that despises gene manipulation, Blue cosmos-**

**-Are using drugs and other methods to create these living weapons-**

**-Human beings only used for fighting-**

Flew away from each other, Justice took his weapon and shot several times at Freedom, not wanting to actually hit it

Freedom's bounce off shield activated and the shots were repelled

**-After this war ends, I wish to make such a world by all means-**

**-A world where everyone can live in happiness-**

Freedom fired it's main guns again, all locked on Justice who easily dodged it though

It was after that that Shinn spoke, yet Athrun couldn't make anything of it

"I will... I will never again!"

Justice started to charge at Freedom again

* * *

As Shinn spoke these words out loud something snapped

His eyes widened in despair as several other flashes went through his mind

He remembered the dead people on the hill, also a large unit who seemed to have caused it, it looked very similar like the Unit he was in now

Then came something else

It was a child version of him, of about 6 years old

He was standing in a hallway, the lights in the ceiling shinned brightly

He looked in front of him, the hallway was filled with blood,

here and there several children of propally his own age were lying dead, blood streaming from multiple wounds propally inflicted by a sharp weapon

He looked in front of him, a knife was lying in a small lair of blood that was in this room

Also his clothes were stained with a lot of blood seemingly not his, blood was dripping from his face hitting the ground

Shinn screamed

* * *

As Justice charged at Freedom suddenly Shinn's scream went through the COM link

Justice taking no sidesteps continued to charge until all the sudden Freedom's engines stopped and slowly the unit started to fall in the ocean below

Quickly Justice manoeuvred down and took a hold of the Freedom unit

Why it all the sudden went numb Athrun didn't know

* * *

Moments later both units landed in the armoury or what was left of it

It had taken some difficulty in carrying freedom inside though,

still no sound was hear able from Shinn's cockpit, Athrun was worried

The elevator doors opened and Kira, Lacuss and Cagalli had quickly ran up to the two units

Justice's cockpit opened and Athrun came out, starring down he saw the 3 of them running up

He came down on the ground as Kira walked up to him

"Anything?"

Athrun shook his head and the two of them looked at Freedom

Both of them walked to a small platform that rose up to the cockpit,

Kira entered in a code and slowly the doors of the cockpit opened making a sizzling sound of pressure release

Athrun and Kira's eyes narrowed as slowly they were able to see what was going on inside

Shin was unconscious for some reason,

hanging numb in the seat restrains, his hands still on the controls,

blood was ripping down his right cheek, just a thin line, the bandages that still covered Shinn's right eye now had a dull red stain on them

"Shinn!"

Athrun quickly went inside the cockpit,

with the help of Kira they carried him out, both devastated by the scene they carried him to the medical facility


	9. Secrets holding hands

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

sorry for not uploading last weekend, since last time I uploaded 2 chapters but that's not why I didn't update last weekend

I had a writers block but after seeing the newest episode subbed and having a wacky dream about Shinn, Kira and Athrun I reminded myself on what I wanted to do with this story

So sorry for not uploading last weekend, I will upload now and again this weekend when the RAW episode is online

Though I was surprised like hell when watching the newest episode, it gave me tons of inspiration and I have decided to keep the main story stream intact

Also I now found out who Rey really looks a lot like

And I made a friend of mine Gundam addicted :D now im not all alone in school!

Have fun reading

Thanks for the reviews, don't worry about Shinn though

And don't hesitate on reviewing again

* * *

Archangel had re docked in Orb's bay

Due to damage in the storage room it needed repairs and had to refill supplies

Several mechanics needed medical attention, no one was killed

* * *

**Orb General Hospital**

Shinn was lying on a white table, wearing no shirt, a white blanket covered his lower body

His eye was re bandaged

Slowly the white table started to shuffle into a CAT Scan device, the scanners in the wall slowly spinning around in a circle around him

Behind a window several doctors were busy making notes and checking the results of the scan

* * *

Moments later Shinn was placed in a hospital bed,

The room was completely white, the bed standing near the window, several chairs were located in the room

The door of the room slid open and slowly Athrun and Kira walked in

Athrun stopped in his tracks when looking at Shinn, sleeping peacefully underneath the white sheets

Then from behind Lacuss put her hand on his shoulder, insisting him to walk on

He did so and took place in the seat beside Shinn's bed, looking at him with narrowed eyes

Silence now ruled the room, Athrun was starring at the floor, Kira was standing at Shinn's feet bed end, looking outside the window and Lacuss was sitting on a chair next to the door, she sighed

Several seconds later the door reopened and a doctor walked in the room, Lacus quickly got up as did Athrun

* * *

"The CAT scan showed some abnormalities"

The Doctor flicked on the lights in the survelance room as the 3 of them walked inside

Through the window behind the room they could see Shinn back on the table again, the table once more went back into the CAT scanner and started to activate

The Doctor walked to a desk and opened a laptop located on it, witch showed a scan picture of what was probably Shinn's brain, everything seemed fine yet there was a small black dot somewhere in the back

"This part of the brains registers memories and your consciousness"

The Doctor pointed at the small black dot

"But this dot back here, is not supposed to be there, we scanned in it more deeply to find out that it's a chip of some kind"

Athrun's eyes narrowed as he tried to figure out what was going on with Shinn, yet it left him confused and now it made things even weirder

"But what's even stranger is this"

After pushing in a few buttons the scan changed, showing Shinn's brainwaves, flowing thought the previous picture in a light purple colour

"This is the brain flow of you sub consciousness, things that you dream and remember, things that happen that you cannot forget or things that you simply cant forget as how to walk, talk and act in other words your complete memory and self, but-"

The doctor pressed in on a few buttons, zooming in on the part of the chip

"It seems that parts of the subconscious flow is going through the chip and that some parts are getting absorbed by it, I think that the chip stores quite some things that he simple can't remember now"

The Doctor closed off the scanning program, shut down the computer and turned on the lights again, in the back room the table Shinn was lying on started to get out of the CAT scan

The Doctor sighed as he turned back to the 3 of them

"The chip has some damage, probably from a head accident, I don't know what will happen to him"

then there was silence, Athrun just starred with disbelief in his eyes at the unconscious Shinn in the other room, Kira keeping a close look on him

"What are his chances if you were to remove this chip?"

Kira gaze turned to Lacuss, she didn't even know Shinn, well he didn't know him well either but he was surprised that she was concerned for him

The Doctor sighed and opened the door

"The is a 90 chance that he will die, the chip is in the far back of the brain and even if he survives somehow there is an even greater chance that he will lose all his memory"

* * *

-In other words those who prevent this, the world true enemy-

**-Shinn, it's will be over soon, please hang in there-**

**-Shinn-**

"Shinn"

Shinn opened his eyes, blinking several time at the light above him, a shadow was hovering over him witch took shape

"A..thrun"

Athrun smiled at him and leaned back to his seat, resting his arms on Shinn's bed

"How are you feeling?"

Shinn didn't response, he quickly turned his back on Athrun and curled up

Athrun sighed as he slowly got up and walked to the door, he looked over his shoulder one last time and then left the room, the door sliding closed behind him as he soft sounds of crying faded away from his hearing

* * *

Later in the evening Kira found Athurn near the doc, the sound of sea eagles went through the air as the wind blew hard, in the west the sun was slowly setting

Athrun had his legs swung over the edge, hanging them above the water that was rushing in and forth

"Athrun?"

Athrun didn't look back, he leaned back with his hands on the ground and looked at the passing clouds

"He doesn't want to see anyone doesn't he?"

Kira took place beside him, swinging his legs over the edge he looked in Athrun's eyes, all he could see was pity in them

"Do you think that he went unconscious because of the chip?"

Kira not knowing how the answer starred at the ocean below

"I... don't know..."

* * *

**Back in Orb's General Hospital**

Shinn was still lying curled up in bed, on the table near his bed lay a plate with on it a package of milk, several pills with water and some food, obviously none of the things were even touched

The door slid open as a person walked inside, Shinn not even looking up to see who it was didn't bother to respond until the person took seat on his bed

"Go away…"

he had his eyes shut but the feeling on a hand that was being placed on his cheek made him open them, slowly he sat up as the hand stroked his hair and he looked straight into the most beautifull eyes he had ever seen

"It's going to be alright, no one is blaming you on anything"

Lacuss was sitting on his bed edge, her hand still placed on Shinn's cheek as a tear rolled out of his unbandaged eye

Then she took hold of him and gave him a hug, Shinn was still out of focus starring in front of him but then after a blink more tears rolled down his face and he started to cry out as Lacuss listened to him


	10. The time before

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own !**

Ok after seeing the last episode of GSD, I thought I was going to cry seeing it but ... nope

The thing was to rushed and Archangel pwned everyone together with the rest

I must say I expected more of it though I was thrilled when the end of the episode came closer

I wont spoil anything since the subbed isn't out yet

Also I have decided to give this story a alternative ending then and ife already thought for a sequel witch will come when this one ends

A few notes for myself now though so I wont forget, character designs for the sequel

Possible names: Kadir, Ryou, Takuya and Kasai

Hair:

Long, around upper arm length, 2 bit shorter parts hanging at the sides of his face

Medium flat long hair, jaw length, 2 parts short in face over his eyes

Short hair in the back, at the side of his face longer hair, jaw length, also 2 parts hanging in his face

These made up ones wont be in this story, so don't worry lol

**Review reactions:**

**Lol don't worry about no lunamarianess, I was planning on putting her in this chapter now, don't worry XD**

**All other people, thank you for reviewing, have fun watching the last episode of Gundam Seed Destiny**

If heard there will be a 40 minute extra on the DVD, something like an OAV to make things clear

Yet I wonder how Shinn will respond to the others after all this, he'll be screwed up real bad after this

Also rumours fly and go, there is a rumour that there will a third series of SEED, though nothings for sure yet, ill let you know for the updates

* * *

**13 days ago, Orb waters**

Just a few hours ago ZAFT forces started retreating back from Orb, Luna was standing near a glass window, outside she watched the ocean, ships and mobile suits were retreating and passing the Minerva

yet one person wasn't retreating from battle, it was the only person she really wanted to come back from battle, it may be selfish to think and so it wasn't fulfilled

Lunamaria had launched again after the command of retreating was given, she searched desperate but wasn't able to find anything, only the main parts were floating on the surface when she flew by

She had cried then, screaming out his name, hoping to hear a respond from his mouth even if it were a small whimper she would be glad

Luna put her hand against the cold glass as tears started to swell up again, she leaned her head against the glass as tears fell down from them, the only thing she had left was now taken away from her

First Meyrin and Athrun and now... Shinn

Slowly she fell through her knees as she started to cry out

* * *

In the medical room Rey was still unconscious, a bandage around his head and torso as a result of his loss in battle

* * *

In the few hours after, Lunamaria wandered around the ship aimlessly, the glance in his eyes were gone

the few crew people that walked among her starred at her with pity, yet Luna didn't notice

She remembered all the times she had with Shinn as she walked down the corridor

How they kissed for the first time, how he had protected her at Heavens Base

**-If you distract Shinn, he will lose, You're a hindrance for him right now-**

she stopped walking, her eyes widening

Shinn had lost, did he lose because of her?

* * *

Later on in the evening the door to the shared room of Shinn and Rey opened, Luna walked in slowly, her eyes red of crying, she looked exhausted

Luna looked around the room, in the back on the desk near Shinn's computer lay a cell phone

Luna remembered it, she had seen Shinn with it several times, it was an old model and pink, for Luna's obviously not Shinn's

Luna slowly walked to the desk, grapping the cell phone and sat down on Shin's bed

Flipping it open her eyes widened as she got greeted by a picture of Shinn with another girl

Luna knew Shinn had lost his family on Onogoro island, it that came to Lunamaria that Shinn had a younger sister

Shinn never spoke to anyone about his lost relatives, so nobody knew anything about his family

Luna smiled as she slowly skipped through the photo album as slowly tears fell down her face again, she lay back on his bed and slowly fell to sleep

* * *

Back in Orb things were slowly getting in order again

Shinn was still very silent towards Athrun and Kira, he had tried to apologized but Athrun told him not to, since it wasn't his fault

Shinn himself wasn't aware of what was going on, he was curious yet stranded when it came to it, everyone seemed to act strange to him, Athrun had a sudden show of kindness for him, as did Kira, even some of the mechanic crew seemed to avoid him for some reason and he was forbidden to go to the armoury

By the time Shinn was out of the hospital the crew had installed an extra bed in Athrun's room and every evening Lacuss passed by and both talked

Even if Athrun was in the room he would leave so they could talk

Though the behaviour started to annoy Shinn deeply, he hated the pity he was given by both Athrun and Kira and he also hated the way the crew was acting to him, as if he were the devil himself, but he didn't are to ask them for the reason, deep inside he still felt guilty for doing what he did, he had told Lacuss about the things he heard, about the dead people but she could give no explanation about it to him

**-Those flashes are from your own memory, but I don't know the person you were before you came here-**

Shinn sighed, still starring at the floor while sitting on the edge of his bed

**-But I heard something about you from Atrhun, he may be able to explain it proper to you, if you ask-**

but that was the problem, Shinn hadn't said anything to Athrun or Kira, all he had tried was to apologized

**-It's alright, there is no need for an apology, it wasn't your fault-**

the door to the room opened again, Athrun walked in, wearing blue jeans and a green T-shirt, with a towel in his hands he was drying his hair, assuming that he had taken some time in the springs

"Are you still not saying anything?"

no respond came, Athrun walked to the back of the room to a computer, pressing some buttons and then turned to Shinn again

he starred at him for a short while, sighed and went back to what he was doing

"A..thrun?"

Athrun slowly looked over his shoulder, Shinn was still starring at the ground

"Uhn?"

"I.. wanted to... ask you, Lacuss told me that you knew me before..."

"Before you got here?"

after a small pause a reply came

"Uhn..."

Atrun took place beside Shinn, on his bed

He sighed and stared up to the ceiling

"Lacuss told me about the voices you hear, the dreams you have and of the dead people you saw on your walk"

Shinn's eyes widened, he now sat up and met with Athrun's eyes and warm smile

"I don't know everything about you and all will come back in due time-"

"Did I kill them?..."

"Don't worry, you didn't, you once lived on this island with them, those people were your family"

"Then who killed them?"

"There isn't someone in specific to blame for it, they were war victims and you only survived"

"But-"

"I wouldn't get into it to much, Shinn. You will remember that in due time, it isn't pleasant to remember it right now"

Then there was silence, Shinn starred at the floor again until Athrun started to speak

"I remember when I met you, seemingly I had even saved your live before we actually met..."

Shinn looked back up again and the two started to speak to each other...

**

* * *

**

**next chapter, more Rey and Lunamaria and of course a chain of events like always :D**


	11. Star failure

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own !**

Lol, late update, gomen I'm sick!

I have to little iron in my blood so I go - all the time

And to be honest Ife had a writers block for a week!

I wanted to put in more Athrun and Shinn moments but... seemingly to keep the storyline going I can't put in any soon

Because the major aspects of the main story has to take place, only with a small twist

And the rumour has been flying around for a sequel of Gundam Seed Destiny, something called Gundam Seed Eternal... not a bad name... but!

The rumour is fake! Word came from the media in Japan that there wont be another sequel in 2 years or so... but don't expect there to be one

You just have to wait for the OAV of 40 minutes released around February when the last volume DVD of Gundam Seed Destiny will be released in Japan

I am also thinking of a name of the sequel, having a cool word problem though, if anyone has suggestions id like to hear them

**Review response:**

Opened my mail box, review... open : O.O; omg you took time to write!

Go ShadowCell! I wont be mad or anything and I wont see it as flaming instead you helped me out of an issue!

You see I started to watch Gundam Seed Destiny, ife never seen anything of Gundam Seed before and still have trouble with the unit names, I know what a Zaku is but I don't know the name of those units Orb uses ; (something I would like to know!)

But also seemingly you misread something in the second chapter, Destiny had it's two blades incoming, one wasn't going for the head of the unit, but for the cockpit

Yes it would chop down Destiny's head but as I just said it wasn't aiming for it, and since the cockpit (well I presume it) is quite thick armoured, more then the standard wingdams and such, it didn't chop Shinn in 2 . ; ooh dear, if that was to happen this story would be about Shinn sewed together and not half blind

Notes of future sequel, I uploaded it so I wouldn't forget it ; I tend to forget things quite quickly if it slams me in the face, gomen for that

And yes Minerva will be leaving soon, as is Archangel

But remember that the luna scene was a flashback of the days after Shinn got into Archangel

During the times of chapter 3 and a few after that

And detail, I will assure you that when this story is finished I will start retyping the battle scene of chapter 2 and all other chapters to fix out mistakes and to put in detail

Omg… this is one long authors note, longest ever

Yet I want to thank for the compliment, lol I didn't know the war chapter was THAT good

Ooh yeh about the usage of line from fansubbs, I know something's do not sound right, but I cant get any other translation...

I don't live in Canada or the US and it will take about 10 years for Gundam Seed Destiny to come out here o.o;

The recent Gundam release here is Gundam Wing dvd 1 + 2 –and I own them XD-

Gundam Seed 1 has also been released together with Gundam Wing 1-2, so its really strange and no telling when it will come out

But it will take to long to come out for me...

So ill try and make the best of this with the help of fan subs

**THANK YOU FANSUBBERS!**

Well that's out of my mind! On with the story XD

**Thank you for reviewing!**

* * *

**- Moon surface city – Copernicus -+**

**-When I first met you, I and Cagalli had boarded Minerva, the ship you were under command of-**

Shinn was lying on his bed, starring at the ceiling

**-It might sound strange but at first I thought you were quite arrogant, I never thought that we would ever get along as well-**

The night before, Athurn explained several things to him about himself

Things started to clear up, but still a lot of things left question marks

After the chat of last night he had terrible nightmares, he didn't sleep well at all, he wondered if Athrun noticed

The door to their room opened, someone flicked on the light.

Shinn covered his eyes with his hands as he narrowed his eyes

He sat up, seeing Athrun in the door opening

"Wake up Shinn, it's already 2 in the afternoon"

Shinn sighed as he annoyingly swooped his legs over the side of his bed

"Do you want to come with me and the others to go shopping before we leave?"

* * *

"I said I didn't want to come!" 

Meyrin and lacuss were pushing Shinn forward down the mall...

Behind them Kira and Athurn sweat dropped...

Thanking God they weren't forced to buy clothes for their selves, if there was one thing Athurn hated, it was to buy clothes...

"But Shinn, you can't go on wandering with one only Athrun's clothes..."

Meyrin glared at him as she said this, making Shinn flinch, sigh and cooperate

* * *

"Shinn come out" 

"I don't want to! These clothes don't fit me well at all!"

"C'mon Shinn..."

Meyrin, Athrun and Kira were standing in front of the dress rooms

Lacuss had made way to another, fitting things on like crazy while Shinn seemed to have trouble finding something he liked, Meyrin had offered to help him, or in his eyes threw some random things in his arms and pushed him into the dressing room, swearing that if he didn't bother to try them on she would go inside and undress him herself...

Slowly the curtains opened revealing Shinn in a black sweater, with long sleeves that went to his wrist , the outlines on his shoulders looked as if he was wearing it inside out

Also he wore dark blue jeans

Meyrin thought of this as perfect while Shinn still starred in the mirror wishing he could get out of here

In the dressing room next to his the curtains opened again with Lacuss showing her latest pick

A red blouse, black shirt with a pink line where the zipper was located, black short skirt and knee high black panty socks

"Kira, what about this?"

Kira nodded

"I think it looks good..."

The same thing he has been saying to all other try-on's , only with a small minor difference

Seemingly Lacuss noticed this as well and started to get annoyed by this

"It seems like you don't care"

Kira quickly apologized saying that he didn't mean it like that, Shinn thought that Lacuss could be as evil as Meyrin was to him at the time, he shivered at the thought that Lacuss would be trying to dress him

He saw Athrun taking a glance behind him, he followed his gaze seeing someone quickly turn out of view, his eyes narrowed, he didn't like this...

It was then that something else caught his attention, as everyone else

"Halo! Halo! Excuse me? Do you understand!"

Shinn as everyone else looked down, a red Halo version bounced up with a letter in his 'mouth'

Shinn knew that Lacus had millions of those things, he also knew that at the time she only had a pink one with her

The red Halo jumped into the air and landed in Lacuss her hands, Athrun quickly walked to her

Saying that it was Meer's

But who was Meer?

This is what Shinn did not know

Shinn glanced over Lacuss's shoulder as she opened the note

Help!

I'm going to be killed, Ms Lacuss !

Meer

The left corner had a scrapple of what seemed her location

Killed, that word seemed to haunt Shinn whenever he heard it, it was the word that came back to him in the nightmares he had last night

"It's obvious that it's a trap"

Kira agreed, as did Athurn

Shinn said nothing and for a moment didn't listen to what they said

"Is she that girl?"

"Yes, Meer Campbell, the chairman's lacuss"

Shinn started to zone out, for a moment he could swear that he was standing back in that hallway with dead bodies, looking up as a door at the end of it opened, revealing a light

The next he felt an arm shocking his shoulder, he looked up at Kira's worried look

"Oy, Shinn are you alright?"

"Uhn, I was just thinking that's all"

Athrun continued

"Stay with Lacuss and take her back to the ship..."

Shinn starred at Athurn, like the others, he seemed determined to save this Meer, then Lacuss responded to him

"I will go.."

Athurn tried to complain, but he wasn't given a chance to

"I am the person she is calling for, this is something I have to do someday, right Kira?"

Kira looked away, seemingly he didn't want to give in but he agreed with Lacuss on this one.

Athrun then yelled at him for this

But after agreeing with Lacuss, Kira calmed Athrun down...

"You can go back to the ship if you want Shinn, you look a bit pale"

"I will come too, I cant let you go on yourself, it is something I have to do, after all you saved my life"

Kira nodded, while Athurn starred at Shinn worried, thinking that Shinn should act on his own instead of trying to repay this so called debt

* * *

**-at the ruins/ old roman styled theatres-**

Meer was sitting on the edge of the ruins of what seemed an old theatre from Roman times

Though it wasn't really from the Roman times, it was rebuild

The seats looked like a round stairway that surrounded a small stage, behind the stage a tall wall stood with many windows in it, most used as a background for the show itself, and several door opening like ways that went directly to the open stage itself

Meer was depressed, she didn't know what to do in these times

Ever since the real Lacuss Clyne showed up in the Orb broadcast after the war

-Also the reason why Lacuss was not introduced in the early chapters, isn't in in the storyand it happened when Shinn was still unconscious-

She felt useless, the chairman promised her everything was going to be alright, but she was afraid...

she had been afraid of him ever since Athrun had betrayed them

**-Even you can't keep on doing this forever!-**

She closed her eyes and rubbed away the coming tears

She was confused, all the tried was to bring peace in the world, to reassure people that it was possible to gain peace...

Thinking that she did a good job taking over the role of the missing Lacuss Clyne, thinking that someday she would meet her and that she would be thanked for doing this for her

And then she shows up interrupting her broadcast, saying that what she did was not right at all!

Yet it was her that kept the hopes upfor all those ZAFT soldiers, it was her that was chosen to do this out of all people!

She was the one that did most some of the most important things to gain peace for the whole world!

Meer was deep in thought until she suddenly heard the sound of her own Halo companion she looked up, she saw Athrun coming out from behind one of the entry ways

"Athrun?.."

Meer stood up , quickly started to walk to him

"You are alive"

"Stop right there.."

Meer stopped walking as she looked at Athrun who had his gun pointedat her

Now she was even more confused as Athrun slowly walked down the small set of stairs

"We got your message and we also know that it's a trap, but this is your last chance Meer"

Athrun was nervous and shaking, from behind him another person walked up to him, she pulled down her cloak revealing herself as the real Lacuss Clyne

"Athrun..."

Kira and Shinn accompanied her, both carrying guns, glaring around the area to see if it were save

Shinn glanced at Meer, his eyes widening with amazement

This… Meer looked precisely as Lacuss did

"Good afternoon, Meer. Nice to meet you. On your letter you asked to be saved and that you were going to be killed, if that is true then please come with me..."

Shinn glanced at Meer again, she started to shake her head and backed away

Before he knew it she started to shout

"That person is me! That's me!"

Shinn was surprised, as was everyone else

He was thinking; if she really wanted to be saved from death, why hesitate

"Meer, calm down, It's alright"

Athrun stretched out his hand to her, as he took several more steps forward

* * *

From behind the windows of the ruins, Meer's assassin starred at the group 

She cursed at the current event, but she starred at one person in particular

She flipped open her cell phone and quickly dialled a number

* * *

"My name is Lacuss! Because I am her, aren't I! Because my voice and face are the same" 

"I'm Lacuss, what's wrong with that!"

Meer drew her gun, one she had with her in her purse, aiming for Athrun and lacuss.

Quickly Athrun responded by shooting the gun out of her hands

"Meer stop this!"

"If you want my name, I will give it to you, as well as the appearance, but even after that we still are 2 different people and that will never change"

it was then that Meer calmed down, she fell down on her knees

"We can't be anything but our self, that's why you and I exist right?"

"That's why we were able to meet people, and yourself, right? Your dream is your own, please sing that for your own sake, I cannot allow that dream to be used by others"

Meer started to cry...

At the same time Kira's robotic bird Tori flew over the bushes behind the large tribune, before they knew what happened, Athrun threw Lacuss out of the way, behind them a shot hit the floor, creating a small crater

Meer looked up to the bushes, quickly covering her ears

Athrun grapped Lacuss, threw her into Kira's arms and went back for Meer, grapped her and both ran for cover behind the walls of the theatre...

More shots were fired as Athurn checked to see Kira, Lacuss and Shinn standing behind the other walls...

* * *

The woman ran down the steps together with more men in suits, more men walked away from the windows a few floors above Kira and the others 

Quickly Athrun ran past the open ways to the wall where Kira and Lacuss were located, the sound of machine guns followed them, they were to fast and got through the opening unharmed, Athrun returned fire and quickly retreated behind the wall as again machine fire tried to take him down

Meer who was beside him, had her hands over her ears

"Do you know how many there are?"

Meer quickly replied

"I dont know! Only Sarah does!"

-Assuming that the female assassin is called Sarah I will call her by that name now-

Shinn cursed under his breath as he looked beside him, on his left Kira and Lacuss who were trying to hide from the gunfire, on his right Athrun and Meer

He quickly looked to his left as he heard more footsteps, the men from the floor above them had run down and started to open fire

Kira threw himself and Lacuss on the floor to avoid being hit as Shinn quickly took aim of them and shot the two men

They fell backwards, limp and dead

Athrun then quickly ran into the open, shooting and taking cover behind the seat staircases edge, coming out and returning fire, the man on the stairs with the machine gun went down, a soft yelp was heard from Sarah as she hid again

Lacuss slowly crawled to Meer, reassuring her that things would be alright

Shinn turned to Kira

"Stay here, I'm going to check the other floors!"

Sarah stood up again, firing at the location where Athrun was, who dodged and returned fire, hitting her in her left upper arm, she cursed as she backed away

Several feet away from her another man in black suit with machine gun started to fire at Kira's location, he duck away behind the pillars

Shinn on the second floor returned fire, but misses because the man ducks away...

The person then throws a grenade at them, Kira and Lacuss quickly make out of the building, the explosion went off, on the floor above Shinn hears the explosion, hoping that Kira and Lacuss are save he tries to return fire, only to be grapped by someone from behind, a piece of cloth covers his mouth and nostrils, he tries to get out of the person's grip, to shout for help but only a soft mumble comes out of his mouth as he slowly looses consciousness...

Athrun quickly passes down the open, dodging the machine gun fire and firing back at the man, shooting him down

In the mean time Sarah ripps off the trigger of another hand grenade, throwing it to Kira and Lacuss, who are in her sight

Kira shoots at the grenade, hits it and it gets swirled back to Sarah, she tries to get away from it but is to late, she gets thrown back because of the explosion, moaning in pain

* * *

From further away Mwu starts to close in with Akatsuki, seeing the commotion from far away he wonders what is going on and closes in... 

He lands in the middle of the stage, boots up the intercom and starts to speak

"Are you guys alright?"

Kira glares at him

"You're late Mwu-san!...please take Lacuss and the others with you..."

"...I understand"

Athrun walked up to the others again, asking Kira

"Are you alright?"

"Somehow, where's Shinn?"

a bit annoyed Athrun replied

"I thought he was with you!"

Akatsuki's right hand lowered

As Mwu continued through the intercom

"Here you go princess"

* * *

A few feet away from them Sarah regained consciousness, taking her gun she aimed in front of her 

Meer hesitating a bit when it comes to accepting Kira's over to join Lacuss on Akatsuki's hand sees what Sarah is trying to do, she quickly runs past Kira

"Look out!"

And a gunshot is heard

* * *

Athrun, Kira and Lacuss both freeze as slowly Meer spins around and falls on her side, blood sprouting out her body, as she goes down Lacuss quickly runs for her to tend her 

Kira and Athrun quickly stand in front of them and shoot Sarah, one shot hits her spine and she falls back dead

* * *

Lacuss is holding Meer as her eyes become slits 

"Meer.."

"My.. My song... my life... please... don't forget it..."

Meer with her hand shaking graps something from her purse slowly

She slowly takes out a picture, shakking she hands it over to Lacuss who take it on her hand and looks at it

The picture show a female, seemingly about 20 with long dark grey hair, sprouts and small eyes

"A bright and gentile face...Is this you?"

"Yes..."

Athrun quickly runs back to lacuss and Meer, kneeling down as Meer slowly turns to him

"I wanted to meet you all... properly..."

Kira turns to Mhuuh, shouting at him to return to Archangel, to save Meer's life

Tears roll down Meer's face as she turns back to face Lacuss

"I'm..._sorry_..."

She then falls backwards and her eyes close, she dies

Lacuss and Athrun desperately shout her name, hoping she just went unconscious, but she's gone...

Athrun slams his fist into the pavement, cursing as Lacuss takes her into a hug

Kira says nothing in the beginning, but then turns to Athrun

"Athrun... Shinn.."

But Athrun wont respond, he's crying, Kira can understand that, he would also cry but still Shinn is missing, he doesn't have time to cry...

As the others slowly take place on Akatsuki's hand Kira walks off into the ruins, looking for any sign of Shinn, he walks to the second floor checking everything

He sees something lying on the floor at the end of the hallway and runs to see what it is

He finds the pistol Shinn was using and a piece of cloth, he picks the cloth up, the thing smells of something that even makes Kira woozy as he holds it close to his nose

Worried he runs of to the window, just in time to see a fighter jet take off

"SHINN!"

But it is to late, the jet is gone, and seemingly Shinn is as well


	12. 357C

**Gundam Seed Destiny : the memory of a dream**

**Writer : Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

**It has certainly been a while hasn't it, I was listening to some music of Code Geass and then I figured that I wanted to writ something, looking into my stories list with stories that haven't been updated for a while I picked this one to be updated today, do not worry, I will update the others as well when I have time, I have so many stories and not always the time to update, writing and thinking of plot can take a little while I know, however I must say that I haven't been updating this one because of lack of interest, GSD stopped about 2 years ago... watching episodes over and over again is boring in the end... and slowly you stop thinking about it, however it is still in my heart an with some new music an new similar mecha series it fires up again and shazam!**

**I hope you will enjoy the new chapter, I am planning on finishing my Gundam fan fictions first before I turn to my Fantastic Four and my Digimon fics, I have not forgotten about them... but as many people may know... I only have 2 hands to type and not six...**

**Well enjoy, I can assure you that my spelling has improved... I am getting better by the year...**

**

* * *

**

As the day progressed depression seemed to take place of the cheerful mode that once held the Archangel...

Athrun had settled himself over looking the entities of space as the ship took off, crumbling the small paper cup he held in his hands...

Kira was looking at him from a distance and pushed himself over to him, since there was no gravity he couldn't walk...

"Athrun?"

Athrun didn't look up and didn't respond, Kira settled himself in front of the youth and became frightened by the look that was displayed on his face...

"Athrun... I know how you feel..."

"...You don't know anything, Kira..."

"You love him don't you..."

Athrun looked up shocked as Kira smiled at him...

"Don't worry, I didn't tell anyone..."

Athrun frowned and looked back at the crumbled cup in his hands...

"I feel as if I failed to protect him again... first as my enemy and now as his friend..."

"We all fail at something once in a while, we fall and regret our mistakes, but we also get up and fight to make things right again... you should do the same"

Athrun looked up and stared out the window, if he would stop fighting now he would lose someone who had shown more to him than anyone he had ever met so far... he hated to admit it but Kira was right... right about his feelings and right about the actions he had take...

* * *

"I would like to apologize for your loss Lunamaria Hawke, first your sister... and now someone that would almost be considered as family..."

Luna looked down at her feet before looking up to the chairman again, several seconds later Rey walked in the small room, he still carried a bandage around his head but was allowed to pilot again since most of his wounds were healed, he took seat next to Lunamaria and looked at her before facing the chairman again as he nodded

"I have brought the two of you here for a mission, the reason why I picked the two of you to come is because you are the best pilots we have, I am sorry to involve you Luna, but I am sure Shinn would want you to fight on in his name... he would've done the same for you..."

"Uhn..."

Luna slightly nodded as Dullindal handed them two papers, one for Rey and one for Luna, both opened the files and Luna's eyes widened as she read through the mission papers...

"15 minutes ago we received news about Djibril's location, however the news hasn't been unnoticed... several minutes ago Djibril gave order to fire Requiem, whipping out a small part of Plant but taking out thousands of lives..."

"Why hasn't it been on the news?"

"It will... however I do not wish to wait for the news to announce it before I respond to his actions... for this reason I am sending you out on a special mission, to destroy Requiem and to assure the death of Djibril... before more civilians lay victim to his horrific acts... you will now leave to the mission briefing room... good luck"

The two soldiers stood up and saluted their leader before walking out of the room, the news had now hit the ship and almost everyone had gone to the cafeteria to see what had happened, as Rey and Lunamaria passed through the crowds of crying and frustrated people she was reminded by her own failure of taking down Djibril... but she had to be strong for Shinn...

* * *

As Rey and Lunamaria left the room Dullindal's phone started to ring, he looked at the number at first as a sinister smile appeared on his face before picking it up

"_We have the boy..."_

"Good... I told you that it would be easy... use Meer as bait to lure the cat out... how is he doing?"

"_The chip has been damaged... there is no way we can repair it... it will only be a matter of time before-"_

"I don't care... I need him and I need you to do it... besides he was born for this... there is no way I am stepping out of it now... specially when everything is unfolding..."

"_How about Zala and Yamato?"_

"They are mere pawns... and as time progresses even they will get whipped off the board..."

"_Yes sir..."_

With that the stranger hung up and Dullindal laughed to himself as he placed another piece on his chessboard forward...

"And so it begins..."

* * *

Back on Archangel, the news of Requiem's attack had arrived, leaving all members shocked as they watched the replayed images over and over again before the chairman made his speech, shocking the rest of the world by his sayings...

"_The act that was shown today, was one implanted by fear, fear of loss and defeat... Logos thinks that they can simply run away and whipe Plant out of all existence... Plant however will never fall and we will complete our mission to rid the world of this diabolic organisation and today's act only empowered our strength to fight, because this proves that Logos is not afraid to sacrifice innocent people... and it is because of this action that I wish to make a world without war, without difference and most of all without borders... everyone is unique as a person and has their own abilities however there are many things standing in it's way... disease, death and hatred... but what could be the difference if you remove these acts..."_

Cagali clenched her fist as she slammed it down on one of the chairs...

"That Dullindal..."

The others merely watched the footings, still wondering what Dullindal was trying to do, however Athrun already had an idea of his plan... he wanted everyone to act the way he wanted to... but to what extent?

* * *

On Minerva everyone prepared themselves for battle, being deployed on a special mission to destroy Requiem and Djibril they found themselves on a route to the base, where they would attack head on as Rey and Lunamaria would find their way inside to destroy the base and as they closed in they found out that their presence wasn't wanted as a whole squad of Wingdams employed from the underground base...

Lunamaria launched, quickly followed by Rey and both were immediately stuck in a loop of dodging incoming beams from the enemy... seeing as Luna would have trouble putting the Impulse Blaster, Rey launched his Dragoon system, quickly taking out many of the Wingdams however, the more they blasted the more there seemed to be coming out of the base and as Luna finished forming Impulse they took off in the slope

"Luna, go on ahead... I'll keep the Wingdams busy..."

"Be careful!"

Rey clenched his teeth as he quickly dove out of the slope before launching his dragoon system again and watched on as he saw Luna pick up speed towards the base...

Seeing a small entrance Luna thought she would be able to make it however, before she reached it another entry opened up below her and she was forced to fly up, into the many Wingdams that were situated above her, as she looked below her, her eyes widened as Destroys made their way out of the entrance, she quickly flew out when they tried to fire at her, she screamed as she felt one of the beams hitting Impulse, losing one of Impulse's legs in the progress...

'...Shinn'

* * *

'_...Shinn'_

Shinn's eyes widened as he heard Luna's voice in his head, there was a bright light shinning in front of him as he could see air bubbles progressing around him...

Where was he? But he didn't care much about it though, he could feel something... someone was in danger... and he closed his eyes as he tried to remember who and slowly as time passed an image came into his mind of a young woman, smiling as she looked at him before turning into flames... Shinn's eyes widened as this happened... he didn't want anyone to die... not anymore... as he pressed his eyes together he could feel something stirring from inside as a sound filled his ears... much like a soft beep it progressed to a sound he would rather not hear as his head started to hurt

"Target is responding... shut down the system!"

"Negative he is blocking our commands... it won't respond..."

"Target's energy field is increasing... if it stays this way the entry plug will be destroyed!"

"Release the liquid!"

"We can't... it is the only thing that is keeping him alive right now!"

"DO IT!"

before Shinn knew what was happening he could feel liquid being drained away from him, he fell down on his knees and as instinct covered his head with his hands as he opened his eyes a little, he was looking at a metal floor that had holes on the bottom, remains of a green coloured liquid still lay around in puddles as he looked at the many threads surrounding him, he wasn't able to move, his head was hurting really bad and before he even realised it he was pulled up by someone, something cold touched his shoulder and he felt a sting of pain before everything turned black

* * *

Back in the battle field something had indeed happened, as Luna soared up trying to get away from the many beams that were coming from the Destroys below she saw something happening below her, the Destroys stopped moving and electricity soared around them before they exploded... Luna looked down in wonder before being reminded of her mission by Rey, looking up as he flew past her into the base and as Luna destroyed the few Wingdams that still remained outside she could hear an explosion coming from the entrance, soon after Rey flew out again informing her of the death of Djibril and told her to head back to base, she looked back once more at the debris left by the Destroys as she followed Rey... 


	13. Laser seeker

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

Yay next chapter!

I have already thought of a sequel for this story, it will be unique that is for sure, mostly because I haven't seen any sequel stories with the plot I have in mind, I am not telling about it either, it will be a surprise XD

Hope you enjoy the following chapter, many questions still remain unanswered but they will soon open up as time passes

* * *

As Rey and Lunamaria returned to Minerva Luna couldn't stop thinking about the recent event, looking back to the empty planes behind her she could only wonder if someone had protected her... her first thought went over to Shinn... her eyes tightened as she started to sob again as she thought of his death...

Rey and Luna were summoned to Dullindal's quarters when the repairs on Impulse and Legend started, Luna however didn't feel like meeting with him at the moment, he made her feel uneasy for some strange reason, as they walked to his quarters she stopped walking and told Rey she had to lie down... which was a lie of course... Rey however believed her and she soon walked away from him to her quarters...

* * *

"Aah Rey, I must congratulate you on your victory..."

Dullindal rose up from his seat, shaking Rey's hand that was when he noticed that his other pilot wasn't there...

"Private Hawke didn't come?"

"Lunamaria, wasn't feeling well... she returned to her quarters to get some rest"

"I understand... so Rey how have you been doing?"

The chairman made his way back to his desk and grapped something from the closet behind him, when he turned around he put two cups on the table, an indication that he was offering Rey a drink, Rey smiled slightly as he sat down in the chair before him, Dullindal proceeded pouring tea in the two cups before he turned to the wall behind Rey, walking over he dimmed the lights as he took stance behind the sitting youth, one hand gently stroking through his hair as he looked down at Rey who looked up, slightly blushing as they began to talk...

* * *

After her long shower Lunamaria made her way out of the cabin, having nothing but a towel in her hands to cover her feminine parts she made way to the small pile of clothes and possessions, carefully she picked up the small pink cell phone lying on top of the pile, flipping it open she was greeted by a picture of Shinn from about three years ago, she sighed as she close it again before continuing to get dressed...

When she came to her room, she locked the door and let herself fall down on her bed before turning on a small television station, the only thing that was on TV was the chairman's speech that he held earlier... she sighed as she turned her attention back to the pink cell phone...

* * *

**-Password denied-**

**-Password denied-**

**-Password denied-**

Athrun slammed his fist down on the desk as he leaned back in his seat, his room was a mess and the lights weren't on, however the only thing he cared about for the moment was to crack open this file...

They had found a small disc hidden amongst the papers and diaries that Dullindal held about his project Destiny, which they had started to read through more thoroughly due to the change of circumstances, however the disc was hiding between two pages that were pasted together, it was because of luck that Athrun had found it however he wouldn't be so interested in it if the title of the CD didn't make him shiver down his spine, there was a title written on the disc, together with a name...

Patient N.O.: 100265

Name: Asuka

It was obvious to Athrun that this was about either his friend or that it at leased involved him, it couldn't have been coincidence that Shinn's last name was Asuka as well...

Pressing on the eject button his computer started to eject the disc out of its system, Athrun sighed as he held it up looking at it confused and worried, he closed his eyes suddenly when a light turned on in his room, he flinched as he saw Kira standing in the doorway with a worried look on his face

"Athrun, you're overdoing yourself..."

"Shut up... I have to do this..."

Kira sighed as he started to pick up some of the lose papers from their research from the ground

"Murrue is angry at you for taking these papers to your room... she wants you to stop being so selfish and return them before she comes down here herself to take care of this..."

"I don't care what Murrue says..."

Athrun turned his gaze back upwards and noticed something... carefully he took a better sight of the small disc before keeping it up in the light once again... Kira noticed his friends change in behaviour and walked up to him, wondering what was going on he started to ask him if there was something wrong but Athrun didn't say anything, instead he held the disc in the light and closer to his eyes...

"...There is a small number imprinted on the side..."

Quickly grapping a pen and piece of paper Athrun started to write down the twenty digit number, it could be the only lead they had but it was worth risking the chance, quickly he inserted the disc in his computer and opened the file, carefully he typed in the number and hit enter, shock entered his eyes as the screen disappeared and opened up another showing an animated logo of the Logos before opening a data file, shocking both Athrun and Kira, Athrun simply fell forward holding his head in his hands as he clenched his teeth in anger, Kira simply froze, not believing what he was seeing before him...

"...That can't be true..."

Athrun looked up again with a more serious expression... confused as he was he started to read through the page as he was still disturbed by the thought of this being a fact...

The page that stood before them was one that contained information on one of the patients undergoing what Logos would revert to as treatment, however what Athrun understood from Logos was that they had used children to create what they thought would be the ultimate enemy against coordinators... children raised to kill... genetically manipulated to enhance their capacities, however this made no sense to that old theory... Sting, Auel and Stellar were all neutrals...

Athrun looked up at the small identification picture in the left top corner and narrowed his eyes as he looked into a pair of familiar ruby coloured eyes...

What would Logos want from a coordinator when they wanted to eliminate them... and most importantly what did they want from Shinn...

As Athrun looked through the data next to Shinn's picture he could tell that he was brought in when he was six years old, the page didn't contain much data about what they did to him however Athrun did make out that when Shinn turned twelve he was allowed to leave Logos and was being brought in custody of Marianne Asuka on Orb...

As Athrun flipped through several other pages, Athrun made yet another dreadful discovery...

Logos was researching new ways on improving piloting skills... however as he read on through the rest of the pages his stomach nearly flipped...

_As the research continues we have found that the treatment given to patient 200565 and patient 200894 is being rejected by the subject's body... the spine implanted metallic sync plates covering the discs of the cervical and thoracic parts of the spine to improve nerve signals and to increase mental capacity started interfering with their nerve signal and caused paralysation and brain damage, for this reason a safety procedure has been taken care of for patient 100256, who has shown great improvement after receiving plates surrounding the discs in the thoracic area but showed a change in behaviour and control after receiving discs in the cervical area... due to behaviour changes the patient will undergo treatment by insert of a microchip inside the hippocampus, the chip, model XF245 will contain the behaviour problem and make sure that the mental damage stays contained before returning back into custody of Marianne Asuka together with his younger sister patient 100257..._

_...however the organisation is concerned about 100256's recent change in personality and behaviour, after injuring seven of the staff and successfully terminating three of them he was to be contained in isolation when he would repeatedly scream for his mother while continuously threatening employees and other patients that he would terminate them if they got in his way..._

_...as time went on patient 100256 became dangerous and started to lose control over his implants, the council repeatedly declined the notifications of terminating patient 100256, for this reason the plates remained untouched and the chip was set on a earlier date for implantation, together with patient 100257, patient 100256 made great improvement and contained his memories of his stay at base 2053 before returning to the custody of Marianne Asuka..._

Athrun leaned back in his chair as he read through this message over and over again, looking at the many pictures of the spine implants and the chip implantation... he couldn't believe this... Shinn Asuka, Zaft ace pilot... the person that he mostly held dear was involved with Logos... not only that he was brought in as a six year old... why would Logos do such a thing...

Leaning forward Athrun tightened his fists and clenched his teeth as shock still hit him, however when he felt a strong grip around his shoulder he reminded himself that there was nothing he could change about this... but what confused him more was that Dullindal was holding this disc in one of his diaries... which meant that he had something to do with this as well... Athrun was confused, not knowing what to think about the situation he made himself clear that the only thing that he wanted was to have his Shinn back...

* * *

Athrun sighed as he made his way back through the halls... however at some point he had stopped walking and leaned against the metallic wall, placing his hand against his head he started to think again... still not being able to believe about the things he had just read...

"Even when you're carefree... even when you're angered... happy or even scared... anything but this..."

Athrun slammed his hand against the cold metal wall

"How can you expect me to believe this... this can't be true..."

* * *

"Did we receive any answers from the other countries?"

"No sir, however two have been taking a stance to rebel again your request, those are Orb and the Scandinavian Kingdom"

frowning Dullindal continued to press several buttons down on his desk as the television screen opened up, showing Cagali giving out a speech to her people, clearly not amused by her act, Dullindal picks up his phone and after pressing in a quick dial number he waited

"_...It's me"_

"How are the preparations going?"

"_We had some trouble before, but it has been taken care off... we are finishing the last pieces, however the system is still offline and we haven't tested it yet... I am certain that it will work..."_

"Very well..."

With that Dullindal hung up the phone and turned his attention to the soldier standing next to him

"Start the necessary preparations..."

"Yes sir!"

Picking up yet another piece of his chess game Dullindal proceeded in moving it forwards as he smiled to himself...

* * *

"...yes Captain"

Lunamaria was back on the bridge, talking to the Captain who was informing her about a transfer to Messiah, the chairman had requested it for her and Rey, however since she missed the meeting and hadn't received the order Dullindal had ordered Talia to give it through to Lunamaria, it was during their conversation that they were interrupted by someone of the staff who made clear that Requiem had fired, the beam was quickly making its way through space as Talia quickly turned to her screen, making out that it was heading for Arzachel, as the beam reflected it made it's way to the Scandinavian Headquarters, quickly destroying it as a mushroom shaped cloud made its way over the surface, the crew was left shocked as well as the people on Archangel, who had received the news as well...

Lacus quickly turned to Murrue, telling her to contact Orb immediately... they had to meet with Dullindal because, as she figured out, whoever opposes him will die...


	14. Acces all areas

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

Yay time for a new chapter!

I am really excited about finishing this story and for an ultra surge of motivation and inspiration I watched Ghost in the Shell Innocence again, just the opening alone gave me an urge to write again XD

Enjoy, review if you have time and goodbye!

I made a 2 chapter release this time, for all you patient readers

No Athrun Shinn love yet, that will become subject in the sequel

* * *

The green liquid revealed several more bubbles as it contained a limp body floating within the glass prison, several metallic claws dug down, holding within their small metallic fingers pieces of metal and threads that were connected to the top of the tank, the claws dug down through the bubbles to what seemed to be the back of the youth's neck, his skin peeled away revealing a metallic plug underneath, the metallic plug was connected to small round metallic plates that followed down his spine before entering his skin again at his lower back, several threads had already been plugged in from his neck and as time passed the metallic claws brought down more threads and carefully placed them in the small holes in his neck, several were brought down to the side of his neck here the were carefully being pushed through the skin, the claws dug them further into his flesh and their shape was still visible on the outside, revealing a small swelling of the threads location on his skin, the boy however never responded, his eyes were half open and a black stare gazed out of them, one eye red as an indication of what he was in fact human... the other however looked more unnatural, the pupils looked more like a lens, a round black hoop with a blank red colour within instead of a black orb, if one could watch closer you could see small screens opening in his eye, before closing within a blink of an eye...

At some point the metallic arms disappeared again to the top of the tank before more bubbles made their way upwards, the many threads blocked his sight but he could faintly make out the outline of a person standing in front of him, before he knew it this person had turned around and walked away from him, the person was in fact a woman, her name was Mizuki Katsuragi, the person responsible for what seemed the most important plan for Dullindal's defence, she sighed as she walked down the metallic stairs surrounding the tube, the room was circular, the tube was standing in the middle on a set of stairs, lines were drawn in the floors indicating that it had a draining system and along the wall computers were build in, all of them being operated by various people, they controlled everything, the metallic claws, the bio water in the tank and soon they would have total control of one of the most powerful creatures ever to be created by Logos

Mizuki waved her hand through her long blonde hair before taking a seat down in one of the many chairs in the room, she sighed as she turned to her college who informed her about the youth's status, she still felt anxious about the situation, mostly because he had woken up when he was supposed to be drugged... not only that, everything had almost failed because he had tried to boot up his 'gift' without receiving any restraints... it could've killed him and everyone around him in an instant... but that was almost... the restraints were now placed to insure his safety and of course that of herself... they increased the drug doses and for the moment everything seemed fine, however she was still worried about what could happen if they would activate his gift... what secrets did he hold inside... would he crumble... die... or would they release something cruel... she didn't know... all she could do was wait... wait for the order that could change everything

* * *

Athrun had locked himself up in his room, he was already wearing his piloting uniform however he had not found the strength to come out of his room, he was confused and most of all he felt betrayed...

He sat on the edge of his bed and starred down to the ground his hands situated on his knees, he tried to think... he had to think... his mind had to be clear for battle... a very important battle, he had already decided that he would do everything to get his beloved back... however he was also afraid, afraid of what he might find... would Shinn be the same as before?

Athrun clenched his fists again, as he fell back on his bed, still finding it unbelievable that the person who had been happy for the first time in years, someone who had acted like every normal being, a friend, and an enemy was in fact something completely different... but most of all... he was someone who had been lied to for his entire life and was never told the truth... a truth that would hurt much more than the loss of a family... a truth that was yet to be revealed to him...

Athrun got up when he heard a knock on his door, with a determined look on his face he walked towards it, to find Kira standing in front of his doorstep also wearing his piloting suit, he was looking at him with sadness in his eyes, much like Athrun, Kira was also having a hard time believing it but most of all Kira felt Athrun's pain and knew that there was nothing that he could do about it...

"Kira?"

"It's almost time... you missed the briefing... I was told to inform to..."

Kira starred at Athrun for a moment as he saw that Athrun's expression, he sighed before he answered

"Athrun, we will get him back... I promise, but please don't let your heart cloud your mind... I don't want to lose you..."

"You worry too much..."

* * *

In outer orbit everything was being prepared for battle, Archangel set up their final stages for battle as Justice and Freedom made their towards the launch bay...

Many ships had gathered to join in on their fight, to revenge the lives lost in the lunar base but also for their right to stand, those how didn't agree with Dullindal's ideas now gathered to try and destroy the machine responsible for the destruction that had occurred, Messiah

However standing in their way was the entire Zaft fleet of ships and its soldiers, amongst them was the ship called Minerva, together with Lunamaria and Rey... Athrun didn't know how things would turn out; he would have to expect the unexpected...

Before he even released it he had been given the signal to launch, and he did without any hesitation, adrenaline rushed his veins as he felt himself being pressed back in his cockpit seat and before he even noticed it he was dodging, Athrun had no clue on the situation, but as he found out, it was pure chaos... everywhere he looked he could see the mobile suits of various nation fighting off the Zaft tormentors that stood before them, people were shooting everywhere, giving him no chance to hesitate nor to think...

Athrun fired his beam cannons, taking out two more Zaft soldiers, but while he was making his way over the lunar surface he was surprised, he stopped flying as two beams blazed down in the surface below and quickly raised his shield when a sabre came down from above, it was Impulse and as Athrun figured Lunamaria was probably inside it, activating his boosters Athrun quickly backed away, flying backwards over the landscape, Impulse boosted forward and Athrun quickly took out his own sabre, the two swords clashed and Athrun found himself crushing into the rocky surface of the moon as Impulse still had its boosters running, quickly he tried to find radio contact and succeeded connecting when the two mobile suits parted before clashing into each other again

"Lunamaria! Stop this!"

"_Shut up! __I will kill you Athrun! You..."_

Athrun's eyes widened in confusion as Luna's voice turned to pure rage, activating his boosters again he made his way away from the moon surface, Lunamaria crashed down on the surface, ignoring the damage that this would cause her Gundam and before he knew it she was trying to clash at him again

"_You took him away form me...__"_

It was then that Athrun realised why Lunamaria was so blinded by hatred, Athrun dodged and backed away from Lunamaria as he tried to confront her

"Luna, listen Shinn isn't dead!"

"_Shut up! I am not going to listen to your lies any longer... die!"_

Athrun could hear from Luna's voice that she was crying, however she wasn't going to listen to him, they clashed and Athrun took a hold of another sabre, Luna flinched as Impulse's arm got sliced off, the arm with the sabre in its hand exploded and she was blown back...

"_Sis please stop! Athrun is telling the truth!_"

Lunamaria stopped in her tracks as her younger sister's voice rang through her head, Athrun didn't move and awaited her decision

"_Meyrin... __but... why..."_

Lunamaria was confused, she was stunned and froze in her position

"Luna?"

It took her a little while before she was able to respond, however before the two of them could talk again they were split up by incoming fire, Athrun looked up seeing that Legend was flying in towards them, Lunamaria and Athrun both backed away

"_Lunamaria, don't listen tot his traitor..."_

Legend clashed with Justice and Lunamaria was left stunned, not knowing what to do

"Rey... Rey STOP!"

Lunamaria then used the guns in Impulse's head part and fired as Legend charged into Justice again, Rey dodged it and backed away again looking at her shocked and angry

"If you get in my way... then you're as much as a traitor as he is..."

Luna gasped and before she knew it Rey had fired off Legends Dragoon System, Lunamaria screamed as Impulse's limps were being destroyed, Impulse landed hard on the lunar surface and Athrun could only watch in terror before charging in on Rey again, he slammed against his side and both started to fight again... Athrun activated his seed mode as he clashed against Rey again then quickly counter attacked him with his other hand that was also holding a sabre, slicing through a part of Legend's chest piece, heavily damaging the mobile suit and he watched as Legend backed away, Athrun didn't chase him, he wouldn't kill Rey...

As time progressed it seemed that the Earth forces were actually winning against the massive Zaft forces, it was at a certain point that they had been informed by Yzak that Dullindal was planning on powering up Requiem once again, hoping that he could whipe out all enemy forces, Athrun had just linked up to Meteor when he got this message, he frowned as he felt sweat drip down the side of his face, they had to be quick...

* * *

However back on Messiah Dullindal had noticed that his troops had started to lose... some stopped fighting, others were killed during their period of confusion, he cursed as he slammed his fist down on the metallic table he was sitting at...

However after a short period he started to laugh and pressed a button on his phone...

"_...Dullindal-sama?" _

"...Activate it"

"_... Yes, sir"_

He leaned back in his seat as he watched the battle that was raging outside, a sinister smile appeared on his face

"Now Shinn... let us thunder the sky and slay down anyone who opposes us..."

Down in the centre of Messiah something else was happening, Mizuki had ordered her employees to start the program, the green tube started to lighten up as electricity surged through the threads, the figure within opened his eyes as the surges went through his body... his right eye started to glow up as he looked up

"Sync level is at 60 "

"Mentality degree is stable"

Mizuki smiled as a light filled up the room

"And thus is begins..."

Mizuki picked up a kind of virtual head set, she sat pulled a thread from the head set and plugged it in on one of the machines near the tank, the headphones covered her ears but the visual plate was pushed up and lay on the top of her skull, she pressed a button on the side of the headset and a small microphone rolled out, she pressed the button a second time and started to speak

"Shinn, can you hear me?"

A lot of interception was heard through the link, but after a while a faint voice was hear able through the headset

"_Who are you...__?"_

Mizuki smiled to herself as she put the glasses over her eyes, her vision immediately changed, she was now standing in a white endless space, Shinn was standing in front of her, wearing a long white T-shirt that went to his knees, she walked up to the boy, who showed no emotion to her what so ever, he just starred at her blankly and looked up when she stood before him, she wrapped her arms around him and stood behind him, he didn't budge

"We need you to do something for us..."

The scene then changed, they were standing outside of Messiah in outer space where the battle was raging on...

"Do you see those people Shinn... they want to kill us, all of us... we need you to help us destroy those devils..."

"Devils..."

"Your mother would be very happy if you did what she said..."

"Mama..."

He looked up as Mizuki embraced him a little more before whispering into his ears

"Will you listen to your mother?"

"...Yes, mama"

"Then punish those Devils, destroy them..."

Shinn merely nodded as his right eye started to glow up

In outer orbit something strange was happening, a moment ago they were still fighting and the next an entirely battalion just froze in place, their Gundams stopped working and the many pilots desperately cried out to their vessels, hoping that they could explain the situation to them, however as they tried to contact their captains they found out that only static was coming through their connection and soon a faint voice was hear able for their ears, their eyes widened as they heard it

"_You are a devil... and devils deserve to be punished... would you please, die?"_

It was then that they started to scream, what followed was that their Mobile suit crushed the cockpit space and they exploded, people stopped fighting and looked at the scene in fear, they were distracted and easily killed by the other Zaft forces who saw this as a turn for victory, in the time that followed more enemy Gundams were crushed and even entire ships were destroyed

Shinn looked at them from his own mental space, selecting those who would be executed, however at some point he looked at two other Gundams and he froze, the explosions stopped and he starred down with his eyes widened, Mizuki noticed this and followed his gaze, seeing that he was looking down at Justice and Freedom, the two mobile suits were making their way towards Messiah, taking out everyone in their way, she tightened her grip on the youth, her nails dug into his skin as she whispered to him

"Shinn..."

Shinn however didn't respond

"Shinn mommy is..."

"You aren't my mother..."

Her eyes widened as she was being thrown away from him, Mizuki landed several feet from the youth who turned around and stared at her with an angry glare in his eyes, her eyes widened at his response and she tried to stand up, as she did he told her once again

"You aren't my mother..."

With that she was being thrown out of his mental space, she fell back and felt her ghost returning to her body, back in the real world she fell backwards on the ground, blood made its way out of her mouth as she ripped the headset of her head and threw it away from her, the screens around her had turned red, indicating that something was happening inside the tank, the many voices of her employees filled the room but she didn't listen to them, she had her attention towards the headset that was lying on the ground, the headset was giving off a loud static sound before a child's voice was hear able from it, Muziki's eyes widened as the voice started to talk

"_You're... mother... aren't you... would you... please die?"_

she turned her gaze back to the tank and saw a pair of widened eyes look at her, she backed away from it as she noticed a malicious smile and only seconds later cords that were placed within the walls surged through the metallic ceiling, the screens exploded as more threads made their way out, screams filled the air and blood was spilled...

* * *

Dullindal was pissed off now, he tried to contact Mizuki again, however he got no response the only thing that was coming through was this static sound, he slammed the phone back on the holder, it made a clattering sound and the phone eventually fell back on the table, a static sound coming through the horn, he turned around when he heard footsteps, someone was standing in front of him and his eyes widened when he saw who this person was, however before he could do anything a shot was fired and Dullindal fell back, as blood stained his suit

In another location in Messiah, Athrun was running through the hallways, his hands gripped around the gun in his hands as he ran on, from one door to the next, he came across no one and he found it strange, however it was at some point that he stopped running, a door in front of him had opened and he stood in shock of the sight that stood before him, the walls were ripped apart, the electronic wiring had spun across the hallway and death filled the air, Athrun stepped forward stepping into a small puddle of blood and he looked down at one of the Zaft soldiers that was lying on the ground dead, electronic wires had stabbed through his body, it was sickening and as Athrun carefully walked on he could see writings on the wall, these writings were in blood

_...Would you please die...?_

Athrun quickly made his way through the hallway as he came to a pair of metal doors, the doors were locked and a small device stood next to the door, he walked over to it and cursed to himself for not knowing how to open it, however soon after a static sound filled his helmet and he took his helmet off... the sound was hurting his ears, it was then that the lights started to flicker and the doors slowly opened, Athrun looked up as he saw a green light coming from inside and quickly ran in the room, he stopped running when he saw something in front of him...

"Shinn!"

he quickly ran up to the tank and slammed his fist against the cold glass, the youth inside was probably unconscious, his eyes were closed and Athrun could that they had done something to him, he slammed his fist against the glass once more and continued to call his name, it was after a while that he saw the youth stir, Athrun the turned around and looked around the room, he had to find something to break the glass, however he found nothing, everything in the room was either destroyed or covered with blood or body parts, Athrun grapped for his gun and aimed for the top of the tank however when he fired the bullet bounced off the glass and hit in the ceiling, the glass was bullet proof, it was no use firing at it...

he then saw Shinn open his eyes slightly, he ran up to the tank again slamming his fist against the glass prison, Shinn tilted his head up slightly and Athrun could see his mouth move, it was then that he heard a loud crack, he backed away when a crack appeared across the glass a static sound was hear able through his helmet and he could faintly hear a voice through his helm...

"...Ath...run..."

Before Athrun could say anything the glass broke, the green liquid made its way down the stairs and into the deepened parts to get drained away, it washed away the glass as well and Shinn's limp body fell down on the metallic floor beneath him, on his stomach, Athrun quickly ran up to him, his eyes widened when he saw what they had done to his back, he held Shinn and helped him sit up, Shinn didn't move and looked at Athrun with a dazed look

"Athrun..."

Athrun's eyes narrowed as he continued to pull out the many threads that entered the youth's neck, Shinn flinched in pain as he broke them apart, they still remained in his flesh, Athrun didn't want to hurt Shinn more than he already was and scooped him up, Shinn clutched his hand around the collar of his suit as if it was a life line and the two of them quickly left the room, Athrun wasn't sure about Kira's current situation but he had to get Shinn away from Messiah as fast as possible, he noticed that the place was slowly falling apart and that Messiah would collapse sooner or later, he made a stop at the launch bay and ripped open several of the lockers, Shinn was leaning against the metal wall, his eyes closed and his breathing deep and heavy, Athrun hurled out a piloting suit and helmet and carefully dressed Shinn in it, he placed the helmet over his head and activated the oxygen tank before sealing the helmet entirely, he picked him up again and quickly made his way to Justice, noticing that Kira was still in Messiah, he worried but quickly backed away from the launch bay

* * *

Kira Yamato had just made his way inside the main control room, expecting to see Dullindal standing in the room, however when he came inside he found him lying on the floor, dead, Kira was shocked to see this and ran up to him, it was then that he noticed something on a computer screen not far away from them, he stood up and ran to the computer, he placed his gun on the table as he looked at the message on the screen, Requiem was loading up again and it was nearing firing time, Kira's eyes widened as he realised that he was running out of time, however when he wanted to turn around he met with a gun against his forehead

"What did you do...?"

Kira flinched... as he looked at the person holding the weapon, it was Rey, with one hand he was holding a gun against Kira's head and the other was clutching to his side, he was injured, Kira could see that from the trail of blood that was dripping from his mouth and by the way Rey was looking at him, his sight was glazed, Kira couldn't respond to him, he had no clue on what had happened here before, he kept silent...

"What did you do to him!?"

Before Kira even knew what was happening he felt a gun slammed across his face, Kira landed on the ground hard and looked up as Rey staggered towards him and aimed his gun towards Kira he was ready to fire...

"You... this is all your fault!"

It was then that a shot was fired, the two of them stood still for a moment and at some point blood stained Rey's piloting suit, Kira turned around and saw the person that had fired at Rey, he recognized her as Minerva's captain, Gladys

"That is enough Rey..."

Rey collapsed and Gladys threw her weapon away as she ran up to him, she caught him before he could hit the floor and hugged him tightly as tears swelled up in her eyes, she stroked his hair as she whispered to him

"It has been enough... no more death... no more destruction..."

Kira got up from the ground and looked at Gladys strangely, she then turned to him and smiled kindly before responding

"I am just a foolish girl who fell in love with a mad man... leave now... this place will collapse soon..."

Kira hesitated at first, he didn't want to leave them behind, he took several steps back and Gladys noticed his hesitation, she quickly told him again...

"Please, go! Let me make sure that this will never happen again"

It was then that Kira turned around and ran, a sad look was on his face but he reminded himself of Requiem and that he was running out of time, as Kira left the room Gladys turned her attention back to Rey who was still lying in her arms, she raised his chin so that he could see his eyes and spoke to him, Rey's eyes widened as tears streamed down his face, he responded and a smile appeared on his face, seconds later the ceiling collapsed on top of the two

* * *

Back in outer Orbit the destruction of Messiah hadn't gone unnoticed; the fighting had stopped when Lacus assured them that Zaft had lost the battle.

However as Messiah crashed down on the lunar surface Athrun grew more worried, there was no sign of Kira yet and he was afraid that something had happened, however when he wanted to fly towards Messiah he felt a hand around his wrist, he looked down and saw that Shinn was awake...

"Shinn... what are you doing?"

"It's going to fire..."

"What?"

"Requiem will fire..."

Athrun looked at the youth confused as Shinn pressed himself against Athrun's chest... quickly turned around towards Requiem and started to fly in its direction, hoping that Shinn was wrong, as he flew towards it he got a radio call from Kira...

"Athrun! We have to destroy Requiem now!"

"I know... I'm already on my way!"

however he as he closed in on Requiem he noticed that the machine had already loaded up and was only seconds away from firing, he wasn't going to make it... he would be too late...

"Athrun... get in firing line..."

Athrun looked down again as Shinn told him this, it seemed foolishly to do so...

"Please..."

Athrun hesitated but eventually did what Shinn said and just as he stood in firing line Requiem fired... Shinn placed his hand on Athrun's monitor and abruptly looked up as a bright light engulfed them, Athrun closed his eyes as he thought that he was going to die, he felt himself being pushed back in his seat as he was blinded...

Kira looked in shock when he saw Requiem fire, Eternal and Archangel had fired its own missiles and they quickly made their way towards the weapon, however they had been too late for a millisecond, the beam was fired right before their weapons hit the machine, it exploded but Kira couldn't stop gasping as he saw Justice stand in the beams way, he cried out for Athrun, afraid that his friend would die however the beam was suddenly blocked by something... it was as if a invisible wall was shielding Justice and Kira noticed that it was stopping the beam from going any further, he noticed that Justice was being pushed back with great force, the shield didn't budge and it was followed by an explosion, Kira clenched his teeth as he felt the shockwave of the explosion whipping him away from the scene, it took him a little while to get camera view again and he continued to yell out for Athrun through the intercom, as his visual returned his eyes widened, there was hardly anything left of Justice, its limps were torn off, phase shift was no longer working and what remained was its chest piece, a piece of its upper leg and a part of its head

Kira quickly made his way towards the Gundam and continued attempting to make contact with Athrun...

"Athrun! Athrun, please answer! Athrun!"

It was after a short while that he heard static through his head set and he was greeted by the voice of his comrade, he smiled slightly as he heard his voice

"...Kira... stop yelling... my ears"

"I was just worried... is everything alright?"

"I am okay... but Shinn is..."

"Shinn? You found him?"

"Yes, but he needs medical attention... quickly..."

Kira flew up to the remains of the Justice Gundam and let Freedom take a hold of it; he then started to fly back to Eternal...

* * *

Soon after the mobile suits had landed inside Eternal's hanger, Kira made his way towards Justice's cockpit, it opened before Kira was there and Athrun made his way outside, Shinn lying limply in his hands, Kira removed his helmet as Athrun held him in his arms, Shinn was pale and his skin felt cold, there was blood dripping out of his ears and his right eye, Kira went ahead to make sure that the medical staff of Eternal was prepared and Athrun quickly followed him, he looked down at the youth in his arms and worry crossed his face

"Don't die on me, Shinn..."

When he entered the room the doctors took over and they were shocked when the got Shinn out of the piloting suit, Athrun watched as they stripped him down his expression was neutral however Kira was looking at it with disbelieve, the two of them were pushed out of the room and as it closed Athrun threw a punch at the wall next to the door, he was angry...

"Kira?"

Kira turned around, and saw Lacus float up to him; she threw herself at him and hugged him tightly

"I was worried, Kira... I thought that I would never see you again, Athrun too"

She looked up at Athrun and noticed his expression, she looked at him confused but Kira assured him that he would explain it to her in due time... Lacus told Athrun that Lunamaria had boarded Eternal, Mu had picked her up when everything had ended, Meyrin had asked him to...

Athrun then made his way to the cafeteria, Kira and Lacus had returned to the bridge and all he could do now was wait, however as he walked into the room he noticed Lunamaria sitting on one of the chairs, a can of coffee milk in her hands as she starred at the floor, she looked up when she heard footsteps and Athrun could see that she had been crying, Athrun didn't say anything, he walked over to the machines and got himself a drink, he then sat down next to Lunamaria with a sigh, they sat together but didn't say anything, it was then that Luna fell sideways, her head landing on his lap, Athrun didn't respond but when he heard Luna sob again he placed his hand on her head and responded to her...

"It's no use crying... It wasn't your fault..."


	15. Christmas in the silent forest

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

This story is almost finished, not yet but the ending is near, I already planned the sequel and know what to write, so do not worry about that D

As for the many mistakes I made in my previous chapters, once the story is done I will reread everything and change out all my mistakes

Sorry for not updating last week, we had a very special guest last week that is now staying in my house, my parents bought a new puppy and I was put in charge last week to watch it, I missed having a dog around, specially since my dog was put to sleep on month ago because of illness

Enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review if you want to of course

I also made some fan art for this story but it was only afterwards when I was done inking that I noticed something stupid... I used Shinn's left eye instead of his right -- I felt so stupid afterwards... I got it uploaded online, now no more talk... more writing WHOO!

* * *

Lunamaria's sobs echoed through the empty hallways of Eternal as Athrun continued to stroke her hair, seeing Luna like this made him feel sad as well and because there was nothing that he could actually do at this point left him with more than he could bear, at some point Luna had stopped crying and gave Athrun a tight hug, thanking him for saving the person she loved, Athrun hardly remembered any of this, since his mind was completely set on Shinn at the time, he hadn't even noticed that Luna had left the room and that he was now sitting there alone and uncertain... 

Shinn was put on antistatic as the doctors on Eternal began the difficult job of removing the remains of electricity threads from under his skin, not only that they kept record of everything they saw and wrote down everything they discovered, finding out that his entire spine line had been covered with metallic plates and that the threads that kept them together had penetrated into his spine, making it impossible to remove them, the plates seemed ticker around his neck and there some part of them seemed to enter his skin again, Doctors speculated that the threads must have penetrated his brains as well, but it would be difficult to find out, the boy was still very weak, eventually the threads in his skin were removed, leaving behind a set of holes in his skin, some of them required stitched and others were only bandaged, they made sure that Shinn would be able to survive and that was about all that they could do, Eternal didn't have the necessary equipment for something as urgent as this... and yet the Doctors worried that even with the technology available they wouldn't be able to reverse whatever had been done to him... the hardest part would probably be the part where they had to tell him about what had happened to him...

Eventually Eternal docked at one of the Plant military stations, there was a lot going on, Zaft was in panic due to the situation however Lacus would make sure that everything would be arranged and that nothing like this would ever happen again, the people who still believed in Dullindal's plan remained silent some had revolted but they had been easily captured by the police and were now held in custody, Cagali was soon to arrive at Plant as well, together with the world leaders of all other countries to make the arrangements for Plant, long ago they made sure that the end of a war couldn't go unpunished... the harm that Dullindal had caused had to be erased, the many Destiny Plan offices were to become closed down and the database with everyone's destiny were to be deleted from existence...

* * *

It was when the door to the cafeteria finally opened that Athrun noticed the time he had spend in the room, he looked up with caution and tiredness in his eyes when he saw one of the doctors standing in the doorframe, moments later he found himself walking down the hallway to the medical facility where he was left alone, he looked before him at the youth lying still on one of the small beds that they had onboard of Eternal, a oxygen mask covered his mouth and the soft beeping of a heart monitor could be heard, the beeps were stable and his breathings were calm, Athrun slowly grapped on of the chairs and sat down next to him, grasping Shinn's left hand with caution, he had bandages covering him from head to toe and he raised the hand to his face where he carefully caressed it against his cheek however he couldn't help but burst into tears as what he was seeing... it was something Shinn didn't deserve, it was something that no one deserved... 

He looked up again when he noticed something lying next to him on a table, it was a thick book covering every single detail of the operation they did hours ago, the book could almost be a small dictionary, Athrun sighed once again as he looked at Shinn... the war was now over... what would he do now... and more importantly what would happen if he woke up...

"He seems so peaceful doesn't he..."

Athrun turned around and saw Kira standing in the doorway, leaning against the frame, he had changed into his Orb uniform and looked at the two with happiness and yet sadness in his eyes, taking a few steps forward Kira stood behind his friend now and lay his hand on his shoulder

"I spoke to the doctors... they say he wouldn't be able to walk for a while if he wakes up..."

"What do you mean _if_..."

"Doctors can make a person healthy or at least keep them from dying... but they cannot cure what lays within the shell... they do not know what might go on in that head of his..."

Athrun sighed as he tightened his grip around Shinn's hand...

"They will transport him to a hospital soon Athrun, there they will take care of him and see what they can do about his back... and maybe try and figure out what else had been done to him..."

"I wonder... I wonder if he will still be Shinn when he wakes up..."

"We can only hope Athrun... nothing more..."

Kira tightened his grip around Athrun's shoulder

"Cagali wants to see you when she arrives..."

Athrun laughed slightly...

"She's still wearing your ring... I assume you didn't tell her yet, didn't you?"

"No... I did not, however I want to make sure that I make the right decision first..."

"Are you frightened?"

Athrun didn't respond...

"If you need to talk-"

"I know... you don't need to tell me that over and over again..."

Kira laughed and started to walk away

"I'll get us some food, Athrun you need to eat; besides the doctors will have Shinn moved within the hour, but you mustn't get in their way..."

with that Kira left the room, Athrun sighed once more as he placed the hand carefully back on the white sheets, he slowly got up and walked out of the room, stopping midway to look over his shoulder once more to make sure that Shinn wasn't going anywhere, as he walked away he didn't notice that Shinn's middle finger made a slight nudge...

* * *

What happened in the next couple of days was a complete daze to Athrun, Shinn was moved to better hospital but was still unconscious, Lacus had been put in charge of the Plant Council; Athrun wasn't surprised about this... Lacus was still a good person and Athrun had always thought that she would make a great leader, unlike many others she wasn't driven by war and hatred... 

And then there was Cagali, Athrun sighed as he thought about her, he didn't know what to think to be exact... it was obvious that Cagali wanted him to be more than a friend, however he was still uncertain... he had been certain before but after he had unlocked his own feelings he came to the conclusion that it was just something temporarily, Athrun leaned back in his seat as the car drove on, Kira was driving but didn't say a word and Athrun merely looked at the scenery passing by as he recalled what happened several days earlier

Athrun left the hospital room and walked into the hallway, he sighed as he closed the door behind him, another day and still no improvement, Shinn was still unconscious, this time the oxygen mask had been removed since his breathing had finally turned to normal; however the part that still worried him was why he still wasn't conscious...

"Athrun!"

Athrun turned around but soon felt someone embrace him tightly; he looked down and smiled slightly

"Cagali... why are you here?"

There was a pretty good reason why Athrun asked this, he knew that Cagali wouldn't come to visit Shinn alone, someone must have told Cagali of his visit and the more he thought about it the less time he wanted to spend with her

"I came here to see you... I've been trying to contact you for days now, but you wouldn't pick up..."

She had been right, he had been avoiding her but only with the reason that he needed time for himself, time to think and he had many things to take care of, Shinn was given the best of treatment but this was only because of his own influence and that of Lacus Clyne, who was now head of the Zaft Council, money had to be paid and arrangements had to be made, these to make sure that Shinn stayed in the right hands, there were many rumours spreading through out Plant about the artificial modified youth and many said it was because of the chairman, Athrun had to make sure that Shinn's stay stayed a secret

"Athrun? Is something wrong you look distracted..."

Athrun looked at hr again, Cagali's hands now clenched around his jacket, the ring around her finger reflected the light shinning down from the ceiling above, Athrun put his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her off him, Cagali looked worried and a little confused

"I am just tired... after everything that has happened I haven't had a decent night of sleep..."

Cagali's confused expression soon changed to a smiling face and then changed again to worry as she looked over his shoulder

"Kira says that you stop by everyday, did anything happen? Is he awake?"

Athrun sighed and looked at the closed door with a depressed expression

"His breathing is back to normal, together with his body functions however he won't wake up..."

"Ne, Athrun?"

Athrun soon felt two warm hands on his cheeks and before he even noticed his face was being turned to Cagali's who looked at him with a sad expression

"I am just glad that you're okay... I was so worried when you didn't pick up your phone; I was scared that something had happened... I love you Athrun..."

Athrun stared at her blankly before answering to her

"I love you two..."

It was a lie, he knew it was... they were only words without any real meaning to him anymore... the passion that they carried before was gone and all that remained were words without any meaning and feeling in them...

* * *

The car stopped in the parking lot of the hospital and the two of them quickly made their way towards Shinn's room, however as Athrun opened the door they found the room empty, Athrun was shocked at first and walked inside, the bed was made and the windows closed, Kira had left in the meantime to get a nurse to see what was going on, there were no operations scheduled for today so Shinn had to be in his room, Athrun remained standing in front of the empty bed for several minutes before he started to walk around, he was too impatient to wait for his friend... 

"He woke up?"

Kira's eyes widened as he spoke to one of the nurses, she smiled at him and assured him that everything was alright, no one had tried to kidnap his friend and nothing weird was going on

"When I came by him this morning I found him awake, however when I tried to talk to him the only thing he said to me was that he wanted to see the sky... I wasn't sure about what he meant but I guess it was the way that he said it that convinced me to let him look outside..."

In the meantime Athrun had stopped walking and looked ahead of him to the end of the hallway he was standing in, at the end of the hallway a wheelchair was parked near the window, white sheets surrounded the person sitting in it covering the person's back and neck however Athrun recognized the hair to fit only one person's description and soon found himself running up to him

"Shinn!"

Placing his hands on the handles of the wheelchair he looked down only to be more shocked than he already was, it was in fact Shinn but his expression was blank, a slight smile covered his mouth but it only seemed fake in expression and his eyes... to be exact Athrun hadn't had the chance to take a good look at Shinn's eye but it looked unnatural, it was red like his other but as he looked closer he could see that the pupil was merely a black hoop holding more of the faint red colour that his eye already held, Athrun called his name again as he hoped for a response... however none came and the only thing Shinn seemed to do was look outside the window, Athrun frowned in worry and impatience ness and kneeled down next to Shinn where he continued looking at him, he was hurt deep inside, he had hoped to see Shinn awake for days however what he hadn't kept track with was this... it was something he didn't want, this wasn't Shinn this was merely an empty shell without any emotion at all, Athrun clenched his fist as several lose tears made their way down his cheeks, he tried to fight them but couldn't help but lose one or two streaks

"Shinn..."

"_I just... wanted to look at the sky..._"

Athrun blinked and quickly looked up at Shinn, who was still looking outside window, did he just imagine it... no he couldn't have... Shinn spoke, he said something... however before Athrun could respond he heard footsteps behind him and could hear someone calling his name, he looked over his shoulder and saw Kira running up to him, Kira stopped running and leaned forward, his hands on his knees as he caught his breath, seconds later Kira stood next to Shinn and looked at him

"So it is true..."

"Kira, what are you talking about?"

"I just talked to the doctor... they think that something had indeed happened to his brain... although they cannot confirm anything just yet they think that something has happened that might have caused this condition... they say his mental health is messed up..."

Athrun tightened the grip around Shinn's hand who didn't respond to tight grip...

* * *

"We feared that something like this would have happened... Athrun, when you told us what happened when Requiem fired at your mobile suit you told us that somehow Shinn Asuka had been able to repel the beam, am I correct?" 

Athrun grunted slightly as he answered with a nod, the cup of coffee in his hands was getting cold as he found no appetite to drink it; he was merely staring at the dark liquid that he held in a plastic cup in his hands as he listened to what the doctor was telling him

"Afterwards we found out that there was a large pressure building in the back of Asuka's head, it almost killed him to be exact and we fear that this has caused more damage than we can repair..."

"**Doctors can make a person healthy or at least keep them from dying... but they cannot cure what lays within the shell... they do not know what might go on in that head of his..."**

Athrun remembered those words; the words Kira had told him were craved into the walls of his conscious ever since that day and it had always been something he kept in mind every time that he visited Shinn

"Is there any chance that he will become the person I once knew?"

The doctor sighed and leaned back into his chair as he threw the medical report, or at leased a part of Shinn's medical report back on his desk

"I wouldn't get my hopes up Athrun; you should be glad that he even woke up..."

Several minutes later Athrun and Kira both left the room, they said their goodbyes and Athrun was left alone at the hospital, Athrun sighed as he made his way back to Shinn's room, he was the only person allowed to visit him after visiting hours and since it was already dark outside the hospital seemed rather abandoned, quietly he closed the door and turned around, Shinn was lying on his back, the nurses had brought him back to bed before he had his talk with the doctor, they had come to the conclusion that Shinn wasn't capable of walking, but whether or not he would find his will to walk again was still a mystery...

Athrun quietly moved his chair loser to Shinn's bed where he grasped the youth's hand; he quietly wished him good night and continued to look at him for a little while,

"**I wouldn't get my hopes up Athrun; you should be glad that he even woke up..."**

Athrun tightened his grip on the hand once more as he thought about these words, however he soon saw Shinn stir and immediately regretted his rash response, he loosened his grip and wanted to let go of Shinn's hand when he felt his fingers tighten around his own hand, he looked at his hand for a short moment and then looked up at Shinn's face, who was slightly awake and was now starring at him, a soft smile then appeared over his mouth as he mumbled

"Ath..."

Athrun's eyes widened as Shinn spoke but soon after he found out that the youth had fallen asleep once again, the grip around his hand had loosened but Athrun wasn't letting his hand go, he was now certain that he would do anything in his power to get him back...


	16. Smile

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

Hello again everyone, time for the next chapter and this time it surely took me a while to get time to write it, my sister bought a new house recently and I am put in charge of babysitting the puppy and sometimes the baby as well, sorry for the late update!

Thank you for your patience ness and enjoy the new chapter, also I would like to make note that the action will go a little low now for some romance time and that the sequel will be posted in this same story, so people with story alert switched on, don't worry you'll get your chapter mails when the next arc is updated

Historical run together FTW!

* * *

the sound of chattering filled the room as two people looked at each other from each side of the table, a glass of wine raised in the air as it touched his lips before being settled down again, the music was quietly but enough to still be heard, but as one continued to eat and everyone else seemed to talk there seemed to be no conversation at this table, instead of talk there was only silence as one seemed hesitant and the other worried, they both knew it from each other yet they didn't say a word until one of them started to speak

"Athrun, is something the matter?"

There was no reply for short period of time as the glass rose again

"Is it Shinn?"

Athrun merely nodded and Cagali starred at him with a feeling of worry and confusion

"If you want to talk about it..."

"...No, sorry Cagali, I can't talk about it..."

Cagali was confused at this, mostly because she for starters was his fiancé, what would be more important that couldn't be shared with her...

Athrun however made no comment, he continued to eat quietly and when he finished he got up, grapped his belongings and left after putting his hand on Cagali's shoulder as he passed...

* * *

Athrun hadn't slept in weeks, not only had he cut off all communication with his friends but he was also losing hope, the reason for this was the following, for the last couple of weeks he had tried to make Shinn remember who he was, however it didn't have any luck at all...

Athrun sighed as he stood in front of the sliding doors again and continued to walk inside, he passed through the hallway and starred towards every open door that he passed, they all looked the same and Athrun would compare them to the many steps that he would have to climb in other to get _his_ Shinn back, yes _his_ Shinn... this was something he made up ever since Dullindal took him away, however it was only a one sided feeling and couldn't possibly turn into the love he wanted it to be, it was something he had to accept, yet deep in his heart he still cried about it, this was also why he was trying so hard despite the efforts of his fiancé and friends and the more he thought of them the more he felt like he was lying to the world, here he was trying to tell Cagali that he would make her the happiest woman in the world while the only thing he is thinking about involved black hair and ruby coloured eyes... Athrun sighed sadly as he came to a halt by a familiar white door, he sadly smiled again as he opened it, a white light greeting him...

How it had started, well Athrun still visited his friend after he had woken up from his coma, however there wasn't much for him to do, Shinn was still in a silent state and the only thing he mentioned was watching at the sky, for this reason he spend most of his time with Shinn outside in the small hospital garden or at the window in his room, Shinn never said anything to him and didn't even look at him in the start but as time passed there seemed to be a change and Athrun of course noticed this in the start, it began when they were sitting outside in the garden, Shinn was in his wheelchair as always and Athrun was standing behind him as they overlooked the garden, the situation had been simple, yet its impact was huge, specially for Athrun who, in the time thought that this was the way his life was going to be from this point on, it wasn't as if he didn't have any hope, but as time passed his chances grew slimmer and so did his instinct, Athrun was merely looking up at the sky when he noticed a butterfly fly past, however it soon returned and landed silently on Shinn's cheek, normally Shinn never responded to such things, Athrun knew... to be honest he had left the youth in the rain one day for a short time when he grew impatient with the way things were and had stormed off angered and in tears, when he returned Shinn was still in the same position, starring up at the clouds as if nothing was happening around him, this time however it was different, the butterfly slowly made its way down and landed on Shinn's hand, Athrun looked at its beautiful colours when he noticed something else, Shinn's gaze wasn't up to the sky anymore, he was starring at the butterfly and slowly a smile formed on his face, his cheek even let out some colour and Athrun was shocked, not only that he was amazed, he never forgot that face ever again, Shinn hadn't smiled like this in weeks...

This want the end of it, in the next couple of days progress was made, Doctors couldn't explain it, Athrun didn't care what they said, all he cared about was the fact that his heart was shouting out that his chances on getting Shinn back were increasing and caressed every moment of it, eventually Shinn learned how to react to things, his movement slowly returned in his hands and he had lost some of the interest he had in sky watching, it however was replaced by playing child like games to improve his brain activity, Athrun still remembered it, the first times had been more like a painful memory rather than a warm memory that he would've expected in the start...

It was when he had first brought a pack of cards with him, in the beginning Shinn didn't know what to do with them in the start, but as time passed he started to play with them, building up small pyramids first and eventually playing games that involved putting them in colouring order or by simply laying them on the ground faced down and find the matching colour and number, Athrun merely watched as Shinn played all the time, he didn't know why he never got involved with it until his mind finally made a switch, Shinn was playing his number/colour match game once again, running over the cars to find the right combination, this time Athrun couldn't just stare and he had crept down beside him, he reached out for one of the cards as well and looked at Shinn to see what he would do, this because he was curious about his response, Athrun had never taken to opportunity to actually come in contact with him on a close eye to eye range ever since he started to show signs of improvement, however the response he got wasn't the one he had been waiting for, Shinn looked at him terrified and soon after he slapped his hand away, tears rolled down his face as he started to scream at him for some reason, Athrun was dumb folded and hadn't even noticed the nurses running in to make sure that Shinn wouldn't harm himself or Athrun, Athrun never forgot that face ever since and it pained him to see their bond so damaged, however he never stopped visiting him even after Shinn had rejected him, Shinn merely played with Athrun's cards and Athrun just sat on a chair near his bed and looked over him as he played, however as days went by Athrun felt more and more depressed about the situation, you have to understand that Athrun in fact loved Shinn more than even his own fiancé and friends, in fact he would never allow anyone to lay a finger on him... this bond that he had with the youth was crumbling down on Shinn's half, meaning that even with Athrun's strong feelings, Shinn would never return them, instead he rejected Athrun as something that wasn't even worth looking at, let alone accept as another being that wanted to be his friend and this was taking a toll on Athrun as he sat there day in, day out... and eventually he broke down... it started over a period of about a 3 days... the first day he started to think that it was only a phase and that Shinn would come over it after a few weeks, the second day however he started to think about the future and mostly about the part where this wouldn't change... and the third day he finally realised that his heart had started to break, it was also on this day that Athrun first cried in front of his friend, he had cried before but he would always leave the room in the mean time and return later on, wearing his mask like smile as Shinn continued to ignore him, however this time he didn't walk away, instead he starred at his own lap as he sat on his chair and he just started to sob, he didn't really know how it happened, it just did and as the sobs started, so did the tears, Athrun tried to keep his sobs quiet because Shinn was still in the room but at some point he saw something from the corner of his eye and much to his surprise he saw the pack of cards being offered to him, not only that but it was in fact Shinn who was looking at him with a warm smile while holding the cards out to Athrun, Athrun didn't understand why this was happening, wetter it was out of pity or simply because Shinn had finally come to accept Athrun's presence, Athrun would never know, nor did he ever care... the only two things that went through his mind were the cards and the fact that Shinn was holding them out to him and Athrun took them and with that Athrun's cracked heart slowly healed...

Athrun blinked as he adjusted to the bright light in Shinn's room, he scanned over the room and saw Shinn sitting up in his bed, his eyes towards Athrun and soon after a smile spread over his face, Athrun smiled back but soon after the smile faded and he was running towards Shinn, who tried to get up from the bed, the problem was that Shinn didn't have full control over his legs yet and that he fell down on the ground, taking the sheets with him in a last effort on staying up straight, Athrun quickly kneeled down at Shinn's side, patting him on his shoulder as Shinn looked at him with a happy yet pained face, the tears were already in his eyes and soon after he pressed himself against Athrun, Athrun blushed slightly and smiled as he helped Shinn sit up, they looked at each other and for a short moment Athrun could see the old Shinn again, starring at him with warmth and Athrun placed his hand on his cheek, however as he soon realised what he was doing he quickly retreated it and got out the cards, what followed then was another afternoon of playtime that lasted until the evening...

It was already dark outside and Athrun was still in the hospital, Shinn was sleeping in his bed, and Athrun was sitting at his side looking at the youth who surely felt happy that his friend had stayed, Athrun knew because of the smile that appeared on Shinn's face every time he caressed his hair or cheek, Athrun felt that this moment would last forever and for a split second forgot about all the hardships, the spinal metallic lair, the childlike games... everything, however a second can still be too long and before Athrun knew what he was doing he had leaned over and kissed Shinn slightly on his mouth, when he sat back again he received another shock, Shinn's eyes were open and his expression was that of sadness, Athrun didn't know why and then realised what he had done... he had just kissed Shinn, the person he had strong feelings for but also the person that didn't know about the bond they had before and as tears rolled down Shinn's face Athrun just lost it, he stormed out of the room and never came back...

* * *

From that day on Athrun had stopped visiting Shinn, in fact he hadn't left his apartment at all and after several weeks his behaviour didn't only take its toll on his surroundings but also on him, the room was filled with trash, empty instant noodle ups filled the kitchen, living room and the bathroom, his clothes were discarded around the apartment and hadn't been washed in weeks and Athrun hardly showered either, his hair was a mess, his face was pale from lack of sleep and his eyes looked dead, Athrun was sitting on the ground most of the times, even with sofa's and beds around he preferred the ground for some strange reason, this time was no difference, the only difference was that this time someone was banging on his door and Athrun of course didn't get up from the ground to even answer it, much alike to his behaviour towards his phone, which was turned off...

"Athrun?"

It sounded like Kira, however even with Kira banging on his door Athrun wouldn't open it, several knocks later the sound stopped and he heard something lean against his door...

"Athrun, I know you can hear me..."

Still no response...

"Athrun, please say something... if you don't I'll kick your door in..."

"What do you want, Kira..."

His voice was hoarse, he could thank that to his own stubbornness of not drinking more water except for the supply he had in his instant noodle cups...

"Athrun, something happened didn't it... I know you won't tell me but please..."

"I ... kissed him..."

"What?"

"I kissed him, Kira... and he... started to cry..."

"You kissed him?"

"..."

"Is that why you now locked yourself up in your apartment?"

"..."

Kira sighed

"It doesn't matter... I came here to tell you this... they are moving Shinn away from Orb... the media was getting to nosy and they want to investigate the progress he was making..."

Athrun didn't respond, much to Kira's dislike

"Athrun... are you just going to sit here and let that happen?"

Athrun didn't respond at him first but eventually spoke again

"He wouldn't want me around anymore to begin with... what choice do I have..."

Kira remained silent at this and as the minutes passed he started to speak again

"If it helps you in any way, Shinn will be taken to the Western Coast Airport, they leave at 7 PM today..."

Athrun didn't know why Kira was telling him this at first until he spoke again

"You know... I visited Shinn yesterday... he wouldn't stop crying... I wasn't even allowed to go inside, the nurses however did tell me this... they told me that he kept on shouting out for one person... Athrun..."

with that Kira left and Athrun still remained on the floor, his eyes wide open from what he had just heard, by the time he got up he found out that time had indeed made a major leap forward, much to Athrun's dislike... and how this exactly happened was still a mystery to Athrun, but he soon found himself running, running down the busy streets towards the Western Airport, it was a great advantage to him that he didn't live far away from it and if he hadn't known better he would have thought that it was not coincidental that the airport wasn't far from his apartment, the area was set off of course, this to make sure that no one saw Shinn leave and as the police signalled him to stop Athrun picked up the pace, because nothing would in fact get in his way towards Shinn, he quickly ran passed them as they started to follow him, however him being lucky to be a coordinator had in fact the advantage and he soon ran passed the fences as he saw an airplane on the other side, however no way to get passed the fences, his eyes widened as he saw a group of people walk towards the airplane, he recognised a wheelchair amongst them and he immediately knew who he was looking at, Athrun hadn't stopped running and as he looked over his shoulder he saw more policemen running towards him, he quickly stopped and clamped his hands around the iron fence as he started to yell out

"Shinn! Don't go Shinn! Please!"

"Don't move!"

With that Athrun could feel a firm hand around his wrist, one of the security guards had grapped him, however Athrun wasn't finished yet and wouldn't be caught so easily, he knocked his elbow in the guys face who then let go of his arm and started to run again, he eventually saw an opening up ahead and continued to yell for Shinn's name as he ran towards it, security guards quickly got in his way and he was forced on the ground, Athrun kicked and squirmed his way out of them as he started to run towards the airplane...

"Shinn!"

and then he saw him, Athrun was surprised when he saw something get up from the wheel chair and saw him stumble towards him, Athrun however never slowed down the pace, in fact he picked it up even more as he soon heard Shinn's voice ring over the pavement and by God did it sound like heaven

"Athrun!"

"Shinn!"

Athrun gasped slightly when he saw the figure collapse on the ground but soon came up to him, as soon as he kneeled down he felt Shinn's arms surround him tightly like never before and he heard him cry, Athrun couldn't help but let lose several tears himself as he held the youth close against himself and it simply felt as if time had stopped for the both of them...

"Please don't go, Shinn... I don't want you to..."

"Athrun... I want to stay with Athrun..."

and with that it was decided, however what Athrun nor Shinn didn't notice was that they were being watched... it wasn't by an enemy though, but by no other than Kira and his beloved one, Lacuss Clyne, they remained silent as they stood just outside of the airport building, looking at the two dots in the distance cuddles up against each other...


	17. The mother's son

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

It has been a while hasn't it, I took some hard time thinking of the sequel and I finally figured it out, cheers!

So here it begins once again, remember that there are still questions unanswered from the previous chapters, I also have ideas for a third part but I am still figuring it out, poor Shinn his suffering will never end muhahaha

* * *

"Did you come to an agreement then...?"

The man took a deep breath as sweat dripped down his nearly bal head as he looked at the files lying in front of him, the female who was trying to convince him to do something looked at him sternly, her brown eyes determined to have her will and her hand under her chin as she thought

"You and I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to your sweet daughter, right..."

The woman took a photograph from an inside pocket of her jacket and placed it on the table with gentle hands, the man's eyes widened as he looked at the picture taking of a young girl who was walking on the sidewalk, the picture was a little blurred and many obstacles stood in the way of the girl, indicating that the picture was taken in secret without her knowledge

"You deserve to be in hell..."

"That is what many people tell me... but I don't care about weak statements, now tell me what I want to know... do we have a deal?"

The man nodded and picked up the papers, the title of them being Destiny Plan and he placed the in one of his drawers, the woman smiled as he did and turned around to leave the room

"You did the best thing, Mr. President..."

* * *

"_The increasing negativity against Chair Woman Lacuss Clyne has been higher than ever before, for what is known now nearly all of the EAF council has elected to hand out the truth about the Destiny Plan after evidence leaked out about a hidden agenda involving genetic engineering and military activities that led to the deaths of many Plant soldiers, the country leaders that have gathered today at the Plant Supreme Council demand that Chair Woman Lacuss Clyne will take the right action and that information about the case will be made world wide, we stand today just outside the P-"_

With that the television screen was turned off and Athrun frowned as he threw the remote back on the table, there was a knock on the door as he stood up and carefully made his way to entrance, Shinn, who was sitting in his bed reading something looked up and stared at him confused, when Athrun opened the door Kira walked in and closed it behind him

"Lacuss called me... we have to go..."

"Now?"

"Yes now... they leave her no option and she says she is very sorry for this to happen"

Kira looked passed Athrun at the still confused Shinn who was now smiling towards Kira

"Kira!"

"Hello, Shinn..."

Kira walked up to Shinn and placed his hand on his head ruffling his hair, which still made him feel awkward seeing as it was something you would normally do to a child...

"We're going on a trip today..."

"A trip?"

"Uhn, behave well now okay?"

Shinn nodded happily and looked at Athrun who merely smiled in return

It had been 2 months since the incident at the airport and at the time Shinn was staying in a well equipped hospital in Plant, research after research had ended up with the conclusion that the damage that was done to Shinn's brain, after building up too much pressure, seemed to be regenerating, it was healing slowly and in due time it went from saying several words back to complete sentences, Shinn's walking improved but he was still unable to walk or run for long distances, the only problem that still remained was that his mind was still to what the doctors believed compared to that of a 6 year old boy who still clung to Athrun as if he were his mother, though as Athrun witnessed Shinn still showed behaviour that could be compared to the old Shinn he once knew, but they were mostly behaviour aspects but nothing serious and Athrun had come to a agreement that it was best to stop their relationship, which only came from one side anyway because it would just be to strange to fall in love with someone who's mind was that of a child, the things that Athrun longed for would never be reality and as his relationship, as he might call it, never took off he didn't quite take his relationship back with Cagalli either, mostly because he never really loved her anyway... now here is the bad part... he might have said no but Cagalli still believed it would work out, she still carried his ring around and rumours spread that they would get married someday, Athrun could just strangle those reporters...

* * *

Within the next 20 minutes the three of them had made their way outside, slowly of course because they didn't wanted to be spotted by anyone important, once inside the vehicle they sped off, Shinn didn't care, he didn't understand what kind of danger he was put into due to EAF's meddling for justice, they wanted him arrested and in front of a court... to eventually execute him for something that wasn't even in his hands to begin with, Orb's council agreed but only those who didn't have a heart for what was really going on with the teen, Cagali refused to believe that it was Shinn's own choice and therefore provided them a hiding place without anyone in the court knowing about it, they would all be too busy looking around in Plant to even notice that their objective was right under their noses...

"_Athrun, I am very sorry that this had to happen... not even I could foresee this..."_

"There is nothing to be sorry about Lacuss, you've done more than enough for us..."

"_The military will soon arrive at the hospital to arrest him, did you get out alright?"_

"Yes, we're on our way to the shuttle right now..."

"_Alright, I'll try and stall them as long as I can Athrun... but they're quite impatient..."_

"Give us as long as you can get... and Lacuss?"

"_Yes?"_

"Thanks for everything..."

With that he hung up and looked at Kira who was driving the vehicle, Athrun nodded and Kira sped up racing down the nearly empty motorway

* * *

_"They are nearly there..."_

"Good... that means that our part is soon to start... how is the council meeting going?"

_"Though, Clyne isn't letting anything lose but she will snap sooner or later... are you prepared?"_

"Quite even... I wonder what my son looks like... after all these years..."

The woman smiled as she looked at the papers in front of her, one of them having an old picture punctured on the top of a young boy and a girl, she looks up when she hears a vehicle and sees the vehicle containing Kira, Athrun and Shinn driving up, she frowns as she retreats into the shadows as she informs her team

"They're here, get ready..."

When the three of them arrived they found the shuttle bay almost completely abandoned, it was an old facility that was soon to be closed and was only being used for storage and rest place for the time being, Athrun held Shinn close as they walked through the area, something didn't feel right and as he looked at Kira he noticed that he was feeling the same thing, Kira had taken out his hand gun and gave another pistol to Athrun, Shinn looked at them confused but decided to say nothing as they walked on through the empty hallways until they got to the landing bay, where a empty shuttle was waiting for them

Papers were scattered all over the place, old newspapers mostly together with old, forgotten crates that were never delivered, everything seemed fine until the sound of a an hitting the metallic floor was heard and the small round object rolled in front of their path, Kira looked at Athrun frightened and the jumped to their side behind the crates fearing that it would explode, however as the can burst open smoke spread out over the area, blocking their vision

"Kira!"

Athrun tightened his grip around Shinn shoulder who started to cough, he tried to look around but couldn't see anything, he heard sounds of fighting that went silent after hearing something hit the ground, Athrun was nervous, was Kira captured or even worse... dead... eventually a gunshot rang through he room and Athrun feared the worst

"Shinn stay here!"

Athrun got up and walked forward, only to feel something hit him against the head, he fell forward and before he could get up he could feel something cold against the back of his head together with a clicking sound

_"I wouldn't get up if I were you..."_

The voice sounded muffled and deformed, what followed was silence and for about 10 minutes it lasted, the smoke started to clear as the air vents did their work, their noise filled up the entire room and when they were shut down Athrun could see what was going on

Next to him a man was kneeling, a pair of visors covering his eyes, explaining why he was able to se him through the smoke, his face was masked and a mouth mask covered his nose and mouth, the mechanical device must have functioned as a gas mask and must have been the reason why his voice was deformed, for the rest he wore a cat suit like outfit, mostly military like because of the thickened areas around his chest etc. he looked at Athrun when he noticed him moving a little and pressed his gun hared against the back of his skull and only then did he notice the gun in Athrun's hand

_"I said don't move... ooh... looks like soldier boy has a weapon of his own..."_

The person grapped the gun and put it into one of his empty holders behind his back

_"Too bad... I would've liked to see you fight... like your friend over there..."_

Athrun's eyes widened as he looked forward seeing Kira on the floor, he wasn't moving

"Kira..."

Athrun's eyes turned to slits as his anger rose, he struggled a little until the man put his knee on his lower back, once again indicating that he would shoot him like his friend if be became annoying...

Several other soldiers stood around Kira, one of them kicked him in his side but he didn't move, his gun lying next to him and his eyes shut, the blood from his wound pouring out leaving a small mess on the floor, the man continued to kick him and started to call him names, the other next to him then forcefully shoved him away from Kira as he yelled at the other for being weak and pitiful, they stopped however when footsteps were heard and saluted the person walking up tot hem

"Athrun Zala, it's a pleasure to meet you..."

Athrun was forced upwards and was being held by the other soldier, the gun now underneath his chin as he looked at the woman in front of him, he frowned and once again tried to struggle, the woman didn't budge but merely looked around, ignoring Kira on the floor

"He's somewhere here isn't he..."

'_Shinn...'_

"My son..."

Athrun's eyes widened as he looked at her surprised and yet with anguish... was this woman Shinn's mother... was this Marianne Asuka? But something didn't count up... she should've died on Orb years ago... Shinn had told him that...

Athrun prayed that Shinn didn't move from his location, that he would remain hidden, he hoped so however he soon heard a struggling sound and as he looked to his side he could see Shinn being thrown on the floor next to him

"Shinn!"

_"Annoying child... the brat bit me..."_

The soldier who dragged Shinn out tried to kick him but before he could do so another gunshot ran through the room and the soldier fell down on his side clutching his leg, Athrun looked at Kira but he was still lying on the floor and then turned his gaze to Marianne who had a gun in her hands and who was the person who shot her own minion

"No one touches him... not until I am finished..."

Shinn finally took the courage to look up and his eyes widened as he saw the woman in front of him, she put away her gun and walked up to him and eventually kneeled down before him and gave him a hug

"It has been too long hasn't it, Shinn dear"

"Ma...ma"

These words slipped down his tongue with astonishment and pain as slowly tears made their way down his face and his grip around her business uniform tightened, he cried and she looked at him differently then before at the tone of his voice, her expression turned to anguish as she stood up roughly, Shinn clattering back on the floor, he looked up at her confused but still smiled at her even after being treated this way

"The after effect from Messiah isn't it..."

She frowned as she then kicked Shinn in the face, Athrun couldn't believe what he was seeing, had this woman lost her mind?

"You are not the son I came here for!"

Shinn curled up and started crying, his mother grapped him by his raven black hair and pulled him upwards to meet his face...

"I didn't come here to see the son that my sister loved so dear!"

_'Sister?'_

Athrun was most definitely confused now, wasn't it obvious that she was Shinn's mother... or was there more going on? Athrun left open the possibility of Shinn being one of a pair of twins but that was highly unlikely... yet after all these years he wasn't surprised if Shinn had a twin brother...

The mercenaries surrounding the woman didn't do anything either, he could hear the one holding Athrun wince when she threw her son back on the floor but other that that they just stood there

Marianne walked back to the crates and grapped a small metallic case, the opened it and got out a sedative gun, she loaded a small tube in it with a blue coloured liquid and with heavy footsteps walked back to her son who was bleeding from the side of his head and nose due to the hard slam back on the floor, she grapped him by his shoulder and pulled him up, he starred at her crying as she started to speak

"I guess that I will have to wake you again then..."

She put the gun against his neck and pulled the trigger, the small needle punctured his skin as the blue liquid started to run through his body, at first there were small gasps and at some point it just seemed that Shinn had started to choke from it, his mother released him from her grip and he fell forward, his hands clutching for his ears as an annoying sound started to appear in his head... his body felt strange and he pressed his eyes shut as he dug his hands into his hair, the feeling that his head was about to burst started to overflow him as he continued to shake his head in a no like expression, eventually his mother grapped his hands and forced him to look at her

"Shinn, look at me! Don't let that vague image of a 6 year old stay in your head, get rid of it!"

"I... I can't..."

"You annoying brat... you can and you will... or you will kill everyone here!"

at this the mercenaries responded, their stance changed as they wondered what she meant, they talked to each other and Athrun could feel the grip on his arm lessening, he looked at Shinn and eventually noticed something, Kira was missing from his place on the floor

Shinn had started to lose consciousness and his mother dropped him back on the floor, she put the gun back in the case and put the silver case in one of her pockets, she dropped by to his side and checked his pulse, she worried about him not knowing what his reaction to the drug would be, it would be the finishing part of their project, the last part and then it would be done... or so she thought...

His pulse was fastened, it worried her slightly due to the possible chances to a heat attack, however before she could think about possible treatment for his heart she heard several gunshots and as she looked around she could see several of her mercenaries down on the floor, before she knew it she felt someone surrounding her throat and holding something cold against her temple, she remained still, the mercenaries tried to grap their weapons but Kira threatened them

"Make one wrong movement and she dies..."

At this they rose their hands into the air, the woman quoted them as fools for their behaviour and was soon struggled forward towards Athrun

"Let him go..."

_"You got it!"_

With that the person released his grip on Athrun and carefully placed his gun on the floor, backing away from it, Athrun looked at Kira and noticed the pain on his face, he then ran forward to Shinn and placed his hand on the side of his face, he was warming up, probably having a fever as well from whatever this woman planted into his system, he turned to her angrily and yelled

"What did you do to him!?"

the woman merely laughed and Athrun couldn't resist the urge to walk up to her and smack her in the face, which he eventually did though it didn't help much for his anger and anguish towards her

"You despise me, Marianne!"

She laughed again, blood dripping from her lip

"You did your homework well, Zala... but just like you failed in getting my son to love you so do you fail in knowing the truth... my name is not Marianne... don't you ever compare me to the bitch again..."

Athrun wanted to smack her again for her comment, a tinge of sadness mixing through his anger and eventually he stood down and asked her more serious

"I will ask you again, what did you do to him"

"I merely made certain that his powers don't remain in the hands of that 6 year old..."

* * *

"Who are you?"

Shinn opened his eyes as he found himself standing in a white empty space, the floor was covered with a tiny layer of water and he was wearing his Zaft uniform, he was starring into the eyes of a 6 year old version of him, looking at him curiously and surprised

"Who are you?"

Shinn asked him, however the child didn't respond to his question instead he responded

"I asked you first..."

"I'm... Shinn..."

"You can't be him..."

Shinn looked at the small brat with annoyance and responded angered

"Why!"

"Because I am already him... only one can be him at a time..."

"Why?"

"Because it is what it is..."

when that other voice entered their conversation he turned around and looked at once again another version of him, this one was wearing a hospital outfit and looked quite alike to him, the only difference was that this version was completely covered with bandages and had one of his eyes bandaged as well

"Who are you people!?"

a sense of panic went through him as he looked at the who 'him's' who showed no emotion through the entire time that they stood around him, eventually he turned around and looked at them both one at a time and found out that there was yet another standing in front of him that was about 12 years old, his head was bandaged and he was wearing hospital clothing

"We are you..."

He said and Shinn stumbled backwards, falling on the ground, he looked upwards and saw another one above him, chained up and covered with blankets that were tightened around him, making it unable for him to move, he didn't see his face only his mouth but he could sense that this person was supposed to resemble him as well, he could see raven black hair sticking out from several openings in his head, but this one said nothing, he just hung there in silence as if he was a corpse

"And you are us..."

The 6 year old walked up to him and looked at him saddened

"But mother doesn't like us as much as she likes you..."

"Mother?"

With that Shinn grapped the collar of the young boy's clothing and pulled him closer

"She is alive! Is my mother alive!?"

"She wants to see you..."

Shinn let go of the 6 year old and turned to the 12 year old version of himself

"What?"

"But I am afraid that you won't know anything once you return... you've been here so long..."

With those last lines the bandaged version of Shinn looked up towards the hanging person

"How long?"

"Over a year..."

Shinn's eyes widened as he thought of this...

"But what happened... the war!"

Then he stopped, he couldn't think... he couldn't remember any of it... he could see their faces, but nothing else... what was the last thing that happened... he had no sense of anything... and for the first time he realised something... where was he?

The 6 year old noticed and kneeled down to touch the water with his hands

"This is the place they made for us to be together... though you haven't been in here for a long time... But you have to go now..."

With that the boy started to cry a little and Shinn looked at him strangely as he knelt next to him, putting one hand on his shoulder

"Why are you crying?"

"Mama doesn't want to see me anymore... she wants to see you..."

"Why, how can I see her!"

"By looking..."

"Looking at what!"

He looked up and flinched when he saw the other versions of him, their faces had started to dissolve and when he turned around he saw the chained version of him standing in front of him, his eyes were what you would call terrifying, the bandages around his head started to fall off revealing the wounds that they hid, but his eyes were blank and completely empty, blood made their way from his eyelids as this person put his hands on his face and then kissed him what followed was a feeling of pressure, his head started to hurt on a massive scale as he could feel things being poured into his head, the figures around him disappeared as his dug his hands into his hair, his nails digging into his skin as he shut his eyes completely, he started to remember things and they frightened him

He remembered people who he couldn't name, he remembered a glass tank and a strange woman, he remembered pulverizing people, killing them before killing the strange woman and the people surrounding him, he remembered it... but it was there that it stopped and it stopped painful

It was then that he finally screamed...


	18. Worth living

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own **

Whooo next chapter time! I feel so excited to type out this chapter! Yaaaay! flappy arms

Specially after finding tons of Code Geass Doujinshi, I am thinking of making a fanfiction in that category, something messed up as well that I drew about several weeks ago, I started drawing Lelouch like Rei from The End of Evangelion, like huge and in between the clouds stretching his arms out towards Lancelot, whoo inspiration strikes! Ghaaah! But on with the real work! Enjoy! R&R if you want to, reviews always make a writer know that people still read their story and it pumps up self esteem!

After writing: AAAAH! fan girl squeal I wasn't planning in writing it like this cause I wanted to save it for later but I put it in anyway, I'm sure you'll love it, I do that's for sure, just a lil warning I guess this is where the Shinn/Athrun stuff begins :3

* * *

"_Mama doesn't want to see me anymore... she wants to see you..."_

"_Why, how can I see her!"_

"_By looking..."_

"_Looking at what!"_

As he turned around he felt the fingers of his other self take a hold of his face, his eyes widened as he starred into the dead eyes of his twin and he wondered why they seemed so empty, what had happened to make one look so lifeless, the eyes scared him and his expression showed that emotion, he tried to back away but only found that the hold that this person had on his face was getting tighter, he could feel his nail run into his skin, they weren't cutting his flesh yet, they would if he resisted more

It was then that he gasped in surprise as he saw blood red tears run out of his eyes, there was a question that lingered through his mind

'Why are you crying?'

Yet before he could say anything his twin had pressed his lips against his own mouth, a disgusted feeling rang through his body as he soon realised that with the blink of an eye his surroundings were gone, the water remained but the rest was nothing but darkness, he had no time to look around though, he soon fell down on his knees as he felt a pain throbbing in the back of his head and he dug his hands into his hair to try an subdue it, his eyes widened in fear as he then saw different places following each other up as flashes

Everything went fast, too fast for him to handle he was already screaming as the flashes entered his mind, everything that had happened ever since he was gone was coming back to him, however he wasn't able to place these memories anywhere

His hands dug further into his hair, pressing hard against the skull the held in them, he then closed his eyes as blood made its way out of his right eye a dull pain started develop from that place, however it was nothing compared to what he was feeling inside his head, he stopped screaming for a moment to get some air, falling forward with his forehead against the cold floor, the tin lair of water splashing upwards as he did, the blood of his eye mixed with the water and as he felt a pain shot through his spine he screamed

* * *

A scream filled the room as he felt himself sit up abruptly, his hands taking a tight hold on the sheets that covered him as he gasped for air, looking down to his chest he found out that he wasn't wearing a shirt only a pair of long cotton pants, he could see an IV in his left arm and he looked at it astonished, slowly he took the courage to look upwards and he gasped at the sight 

'Where am I?!'

These were the first thoughts that went through his mind as he starred at the empty room he was lying in, the walls half covered with wood and white flower wallpapers, a wooden closet in the corner near two small windows, he looked to his left seeing a table next to his bed with some kind of medical equipment, non of them were working but he could see several bags with fluids in them that belonged to his IV, he then looked upwards toward the standard that had one bag hanging from it and then followed his gaze to his right side, there was only a chair with a book next to him, he blinked again moving his hand over his right eye, wondering why it felt so weird, so unnatural as if it wasn't a part of him and then he remembered the blood dripping out of his eye, he quickly got out of bed and ran to the window looking at his reflection, although it wasn't a sharp image he could see that he still had his eye, he turned around and looked back once more with a sigh of relief but when he saw a dark stripe covering his back his expression turned to fear as he stumbled backwards falling down on the floor with his back against the bed, the first thing he did was removing the IV from his arm, he gasped in pain as he pulled out the needle and then swung his arms around him to feel his back

His hands touched the metallic line that ran from his neck down to his hips, he panicked when he felt it and a strange sensation spread through him as he ran his fingers across them, he quickly stopped doing this because it was giving him such a strange feeling

'What is this... Is this some kind of joke!?'

He got up again when he heard footsteps near the door, he backed away from the door until he hit the table with medical equipment, he looked behind him and grapped the IV pole, holding it tightly in his sweat covered hands as he walked towards the door, when it opened he screamed and swung it at whoever was opening it, if this person had done this to him then he would make him pay

* * *

"_I merely made certain that his powers don't remain in the hands of that 6 year old..."_

This line kept on plaguing Athrun, if only he had asked that woman what she had meant by that, he sighed as drank more of his water, starring at the liquid in the glass as he swallowed some of it

The other question that plagued him was the question when this all was going to end... he wondered this many times before but not as much as he did now, several months ago he thought that everything was finally calming down but now...

He grunted silently as he placed the glass back on the hard wooden table, if it wasn't for the loyalty that the Archangel crew had for him and Kira, Shinn would probably be dead or captured now... in secret they had moved the necessary medical equipment from the ship in the house that they were staying at and as weeks went by Athrun's worry grew, Lacuss had lost against the leaders of the other countries, so had Cagalli, against their own wishes did they place a prize on Shinn's head, Plant was still being investigated and the council was being questioned for their involvement in Destiny Plan, however Athrun had a faint idea that only Dullindal really knew what he was doing and he still wondered about the man's death, Kira had found him dead in the control room and they still hadn't figured out what happened in the minutes before they arrived...

Athrun sighed once again as he rubbed his hand against his forehead, all this thinking and frowning was going to give him wrinkles, he leaned back into his chair and listened to the quiet sounds around him, Kira wasn't in the house at the moment, he had gone out to meet up with Miriallia who was spying on the inspectors, this to make sure that they weren't sold out or spotted, Athrun and Kira were very careful not to be seen by anyone important, so they were certain that nothing bad would happen soon

He continued to think until he heard something, his eyes widened as he realised that someone was screaming

'Shinn!'

As the screaming abruptly stopped he got up from his chair and quickly ran towards the stairs, grabbing his gun from the table when he walked past it, he ran down the hallway towards the room where they were threatening Shinn and stopped at the door, he could hear sounds coming from within the room and swung the door open, only to get hit in the head by something hard

Athrun fell back against the wall in the hallway and with his left hand rubbed the sour spot, a small trail of blood making its way out of the small cut, his grasp over his gun tightened and he aimed towards the person that was attacking him, but upon seeing this person he lowered his gun and then wished that he hadn't taken it with him

"... Ath- run..."

Shinn was standing in front of him, his expression bearing utter terror and fear for the person he was facing, Athrun had thought about it and even realised that whenever Shinn would wake up he would be afraid, but to get out of bed and hit the first person to enter the room... this was different... Shinn continiued looking at him as he dropped the IV standard

"Shinn... you woke up..."

Athrun slowly stood up straight and smiled at the youth, thinking that he would probably be more scared if he were too serious, any 6 year old would be like that, thus he tried to greet him like he always did but he looked at him confused when Shinn backed away from him

"You don't have to be scared Shinn, take my ha-"

"Don't touch me!"

Athrun's eyes widened as Shinn yelled this at him, Shinn dug his hands into his hair when he yelled it and at the same time a glass frame of one of the paintings next to him snapped, the glass splinters falling on the wooden floor, Shinn gasped at the sight and backed away from the painting, falling on the ground as he crawled backwards, his breaths heavy as he continued looking at the small pile of glass to Athrun, who was stunned due his response and the splintered glass, Athrun looked back at Shinn with fear as he then lunged himself towards the boy who screamed and kicked in fear as Athrun held onto him

"Let go of me!"

As time passed he stopped struggling and simply laid in his arms, holding onto the fabric of his clothes as tears sprung into his eyes

"What... happened to me..."

Athrun, who still looked serious on the outside was now completely confused by the situation, they remained still for a moment and Athrun made small circles with his hand over the back of Shinn's head to calm him down, Shinn didn't cry, even with the tears in his yes he didn't shed them like he would have before, he wondered what was happening to the youth and as time passed Shinn started to talk again

"The war... what happened... I..."

Athrun let go of Shinn and looked at him, why was this so strange... and as he stared into Shinn's confusing eyes, he realised what had happened, Shinn had returned...

"_I merely made certain that his powers don't remain in the hands of that 6 year old..."_

Was this what she had meant, Shinn frowned at Athrun as he realised that he was looking at him in a strange manor and eventually Shinn thought of something as well... He quickly got lose from Athrun's arms and backed away from him, Athrun looked at him strangely

"Tell me what happened! Did you do this to me!?"

"...No, I would nev-"

"LIAR!"

Another piece of glass snapped as Shinn raised his voice in anger

"How do I know that you didn't do this to me! How do I know that this isn't just some trick! Why can't I remember anything and why...!"

Shinn stopped in mid sentence, he wanted to say more but stopped since it was too painful for him to realise, it was too confusing...

Athrun on the other hand was hurt, the words that Shinn screamed cut deep into his heart, he had taken care of him for over a year, he loved him for Christ sake and this was the ending of it...

"...Why..."

"...Eh?"

Shinn frowned and looked at Athrun surprised when he saw tears falling down his face, Athrun bend forward, leaning on his arms and almost touched the wooden floor with his nose as he continued

"How... can you say such things when I have been the only person to look after you..."

"How can you say such cruel thing when you should know that I..."

Athrun inhaled and took out a deep breath outwards as he slowly stood up, whipping the tears of his face as he looked at Shinn with a determined look

"What are you talking about..."

Athrun took several steps forward and as he did Shinn backed away again, however he was soon running out of space as Shinn backed against the wall, Shinn looked over his shoulder towards the white flowered wallpaper as his hands sought for something that might aid him in the situation, he started to panic and looked at Athrun who was now standing in front of him, Shinn could see sadness in his eyes and feared about what the older man might do to him

"What are yo-"

Before Shinn could finish his sentence Athrun pushed his hands against the wall and sealed Shinn's mouth with his own...

There was a strange feeling emitting through Shinn's body as he Athrun against him, it was scary for him, but a part of him was telling him that it was alright, a part made it feel as if Athrun was warm and comfortable but it scared him, Athrun was a guy for starters... and he wasn't sure when their relationship had changed but Shinn still hardly remembered anything of what was going on... this was too unexpected and too new for him...

Athrun had pushed forward, his tongue passing over Shinn's lips and it made Shinn shiver in fear and gasp slightly, Athrun took this opportunity and as his tongue wrinkled into Shinn's mouth did Shinn take the opportunity to protest, he was afraid... his hands clutched the fabric of Athrun's suit as he tried to push him away, mentally he wanted to but his body wasn't acting like it should, he was wondering in his mind why it wouldn't push Athrun away from him and when Shinn realised that he couldn't do anything, tears sprang in his eyes and finally ran down his face, he gasped in sadness and it as only then that Athrun realised what he had done, he released himself from Shinn and looked at the broken youth against the wall in front of him, he was crying... Shinn frowned in anger when Athrun tried to cup his face with one of his hands

"Don't..."

"Shinn..."

"I said don't touch me!"

Athrun ignored Shinn's request however before he realised what happened he found himself slammed into the wall on the other side of the room, he looked at Shinn with disbelief and looked at the hallway when he heard footsteps coming up the stairs

"Athrun!"

It was Kira but Athrun wasn't relieved that his friend had come to his aid, he looked at Shinn again who starred at the doorway in fear, Kira ran in and kneeled at his friend's side, blood was trailing out of Athrun's mouth and Kira looked up, his eyes widened when he saw Shinn against the wall

"Shinn... you..."

Shinn gasped before taking off running through the doorway and down the hall

"Shinn!"

Kira tried to follow him but Athrun grabbed him by the arm

"Athrun, what're you doing!"

"Let him go, Kira..."

"What are you talking about Athrun, we can't ju-"

"Let him be!"

Kira looked at Athrun surprised, Athrun looked depressed and Kira wondered what had happened between the two

"Shinn..."

Shinn on the other hand, ran downstairs and opened the first door to the outside that he could find, he grabbed a coat that was lying on the table near him and ran outside, once outside he just kept on running, tears ran down his cheeks as he put on the coat, which was in fact Athrun's black jacket, his grip tightened on the fabric as he never looked back towards the house he came from...


	19. Truth

**Gundam Seed Destiny: the memory of a dream**

**Writer: Asheron Karuma**

This fanfic is set after episode 42

**Don't own**

Next chapter time! Enjoy!

* * *

'Leaves? Since when did the leaves fall down so early?' 

Shinn pulled the black jacket closer around himself as he walked through the leaf covered path, it was nothing more than a dirt road that lead away from the mountains

Shinn turned around once more and looked back up towards the mountain side, he had been walking for what seemed a long time and right now he was able to see the large house where he once was, where Athrun was...

His lips tingled again as he remembered what made him run away, two of his fingers rose up and touched his bottom lip as he remained lost in thought for a short moment, that was until he clenched that hand to a fist and continued walking

"Athrun, you can't just let him go, I'm going after him!"

"You're staying here Kira!"

"But-"

"This is something he must handle alone!"

"Athrun, what are you talking about..."

" 'I merely made certain that his powers don't remain in the hands of that 6 year old' "

"Eh?"

"That was what she told us... back then I didn't understand it but now, it starts to make sense..."

Athrun tightened his grip around the cup or tea that he was holding, his eyes were closed as he thought, Kira was standing next to him, one hand against the wooden frame of the doorway to the kitchen, the back door was still open, the brown leaves had started to blow through the doorway onto the tiled floor, Kira was already wearing his coat and looked ready to just burst out towards the outside to follow his lost friend

"The Shinn we saw is not who you think he is..."

"Eh? What do you mean by that! He is o-"

"He doesn't know you!"

Kira's eyes widened as he lowered his hand from the doorframe to his side, hanging limply there as he looked at Athrun who had turned his way, starring back at him with a serious glare

"She made him disappear... the one who came back is who you fought against in the war..."

"The real..."

"The real Shinn... The one who was there since the beginning, until Orb..."

Kira looked back at Athrun with a painful expression, he still remembered that day and he hated it to be honest...  
Kira turned his expression to the ground, he wanted to say something but he was lost at words...  
Athrun merely sipped from his tea and put the cup back on the table in front of him

"Troublesome isn't it..."

* * *

Shinn looked amazed at the people around him as he finally made it into town, he was still at the outskirts of the city but that didn't mean that it wasn't a crowded place, he stood still as he looked at all the people walking towards him and past him, he rubbed one foot over the other, he had not taken the liberty to take any shoes no socks... not that he was thinking about them at the current time, his feet were covered with mud and as time passed the mud grew to dirt and it started to itch between his toes 

Moment later he sat down on a bench on the sidewalk that overlooked a bakery store, with one hand he started to get rid of the mud between his toes, with the other he still held the fabric of his black jacket together in hope of getting warm

As he peeled out the dirt between his eyes he noticed the vehicles passing by, there were a lot of new models driving around and he wondered how he had missed them, not that he was into cars anyway...

He sighed as he leaned forward his arms leaning on his knees as he looked at the floor, people passed by, some of them looked at him and others didn't pay any attention to him, he looked at the passing shoes and thought about the current situation...

"The war must have ended..."

He sighed again as he got up and started to walk again, he looked up as he walked, the branches of the trees were empty and it was a lot colder than the last time he could remember, he wondered about the time

_"For this reason Orb Military Forces began questioning on Cagali Yula Athha..."_

Shinn's eyes widened as he moved his sight towards the source of the sound, he had just passed a television store, there were several people standing outside the window watching the news, Shinn quickly pushed some of them aside so that he could see what was going on, those he pushed complained about his behaviour, but he paid no attention to them for this was more important...

_"Is there reason to believe that Cagali Yula Athha is involved with these terrorists?"_

_"As for now, we have nothing to prove that however she has been involved with Archangel before and that is the reason for our investigation, we only intend on asking her several questions, she is not being accused of anything..."_

'Terrorists... what on Earth happened in during that time... how long was I gone...?'

Shinn looked at the screen confused and slightly gasped in shock when he saw the date in the bottom

'A... year... A year passed? No, that can't be true or can it...'

_"Thank you Frank for that interview, we would like you to pay attention once again for these individuals... Athrun Zala, Kira Yamato and Shinn Asuka... if you have any idea about their whereabouts please contact your local police station..."_

Shinn's eyes widened as he saw Athrun's, Kira's and his own picture appear on the televisions screens... immediately he grasped his jacket and pulled the collar up to cover his face, he wondered what was going on and decided it would probably be best to leave this crowded area before anyone recognised him, he pushed through the crowd and as people complained about his rude behaviour he started to walk away, not noticing that someone was looking at him and back at the television screen

"Ooy! You, wait! You're that Asuka guy right!"

"Asuka?"

"That kid?"

A woman shrieked in fear as she backed away from him, everyone around him now looked at him strangely and avoided him with a large circle as he picked up the pace, he looked over his shoulder to the people behind him and turned his vision back to the road, he started to get nervous

'I mustn't get caught... I don't even know what's going on...'

With that he started running, the people behind him now shouting something that he didn't want to hear as he ran straight ahead, pushing everyone aside in front of him

"Stop! You're under arrest!"

Shinn stopped running and looked ahead, several policemen stood before him and made their way towards him, he gasped and looked around him

Shinn turned and ran towards the street, ignoring the vehicles coming his way, one driver pressed on his horn with anger as he hit the breaks, Shinn was almost knocked over by the vehicle, his arm was leaning on the front side as he quickly recovered and continued running into an alleyway, he had lost distance with the cops who chased him, he ignored their shouting and saw several other people up ahead, the probably worked in one of the stores and now had their break

"Stop him!"

One of the bigger men grabbed him by the arm and he was being pulled backwards, Shinn shouted as he felt himself being pulled backwards, he couldn't get caught, not now...

Before he even realised what he had done the man lay on the floor and had let go of his arm, the people around him backed away from him in fear and then Shinn knew what he had done, he had jumped up when the man grabbed his jacket with his other hand and he had kicked him right below the jaw, his jacket was now opened and his chest bare, he caught his breath as he looked at the man below him, who was now curling up and rubbing one hand over his sour mouth

"Don't move!"

Shinn tried to turn around when he heard several blasts around him, the cops behind him had pulled their rifles and had started to open fire on him

'Warning shots?'

Shinn ignored their request and continued running, several more shots were fired, the store workers shrieked in fear as they ducked and crawled away from the scene

Shinn ran around a corner and then another, he could hear the cops behind him, they were close on his tail, it was then that he got to a straight lane with on the end a dead-end, he cursed as he looked at the fence blocking his way, he started to run towards it hoping that he would be able to make it in time without being shot

"Stop or we'll shoot!"

He continued running and closed his eyes shut as he picked up the pace, he heard shots behind him but he wasn't feeling anything...

'Please let me make it... let me make it, let me make it... please!'

And then he jumped...

"Unbelievable..."

"Unreal!"

"Damned!"

The voices started to fade away and Shinn noticed the wind in his hair, he opened his eyes and gasped at the sight below him

'The sky!'

He could see the city below him, the block where he was just running it all started to shrink in his vision as he went higher and higher

'What just happened...? What is this!?'

Was he flying? It didn't make sense to him and it scared him a little, Shinn moved his arms outwards and stretched his legs as he looked ahead, he didn't notice the glow coming from his right eye, but a smile started to cover his face as he looked at the sun which was setting down in the west, something about this was making him smile... it didn't matter what had happened to him at that point but the thought of being able to do such a thing pleased him sort of, it was when he started to go down again that he started to worry

Shinn first started to mumble and move his arms up and down in large circles when he noticed that he wasn't going up anymore, it was when he felt himself fall down in a free fall that he started to scream, the glow on his eye was gone as he lost altitude and before he knew it he was lost in branches and twigs before landing hard on the ground on his back, he could make out the screaming of a young girl and saw something above him but then everything went black...

* * *

"Smells... nice..." 

Shinn noticed that a small trail of drool was hanging out of his mouth, his eyes were still closed and he felt really warm...

"Mama, Angel is waking up!"

'Angel?'

Shinn's eyes shot open and he sat up quickly, one hand immediately grasping for his back as he felt a sour pain coming from that place

"Be careful, you hurt your back..."

Shinn looked up seeing a woman standing next to him wearing an apron, her brown hair was tied up behind her head and she looked at him worried, Shinn stared back at her until he heard someone next to him

"Angel!"

Before he could react someone flung herself at him and hugged him tightly, he grunted painfully as he pushed the girl away from him, she was about 6 years old and stared at him obsessed and scary...

"Angel?"

The girl nodded and continued to talk to him with a happy tone

"You came from the sky! Angel!"

He looked at her mother who merely smiled at him and he turned back to the obsessed child who flung herself at him again and continued to touch and poke the metallic spine covering his back, her hands kept on sneaking into the two holes that were situated on one of the thinker discs in his neck

"Is this where your wings went, Angel?"

When he realised that she was touching his discs he pushed her away roughly and rubbed a hand over the back of his neck making sure that everything was still in tact, the girl in front of him looked at him saddened and tears sprung into her eyes

"You can't just go by touching people… underst- ah!"

When Shinn looked at her again he noticed her tears and bent forward, placing both hands on the couch as he leaned closer to her

"Don't cry!"

"Angel is being mean!"

She started to cry louder and Shinn was worried about her mother getting angry with him, he looked at the door to the kitchen and back at the child, continued switching until he placed both hands around the child's face and looked at her with a happy expression

"I'm sorry, don't cry... it's just... I don't even know where I am right now..."

"Mana? Don't bother Angel that much!"

The little girl with the name Mana turned towards the kitchen door and smiled as her mother pushed open the wooden door and walked in with a bowl in her hands, Shinn could smell that the scent coming from it was really nice and drooled slightly as she placed it in front of him, it was a stew, made from potatoes, carrots and unions and here and there a sausage piece stuck out of it

"There you go..."

Shinn looked up at the woman and asked her

"Are you sure?"

"Eat up"

She smiled and Shinn smiled back in gratitude, he grabbed the spoon sticking out of the stew and started eating, the woman smiled even more when she noticed that he liked her cooking and eventually left the room, Mana followed her smiling and laughing

Eventually Shinn finished his meal and set the bowl back on the table, Shinn could hear Mana back in the kitchen and smiled as he looked at the door however as he turned back to the empty bowl in front of him he felt a small taint of sadness, maybe it was because of the kindness he was experiencing... He wasn't even sure if he was at a save place...

He sighed and picked up the bowel with one hand, with the other he pushed back the blanket that was covering him and he walked towards the kitchen, he opened the door and looked at the woman with a serious expression

"Thank you for the meal..."

His expression didn't change as she smiled at him and took the bowl from his hands, she placed it into the warm water of the sink where she started to wash it...

"Would you be so kind and help me with these dishes?"

Shinn stepped forward and grabbed the cotton cloth hanging over the radiator, he then walked to the other side of the woman, grabbed a pan and started to dry it off with the cloth

"Why are you being so kind to me...?"

"Why shouldn't I be?"

"You probably know why..."

"And should that influence my judgement over you?"

Shinn looked up at the woman, who continued to wash the dishes, she didn't look at him and she kept on smiling as if nothing was wrong...

"Are you really that much of a bad person?"

Shinn broke his gaze and continued looking at the wet dishes next to the sink

"I don't know... I don't know what to believe anymore, I don't know what has happened in the past year, I don't know what happened to my friends and I don't know myself anymore either..."

"When everything is lost and you feel like you have no one to turn to, look deep into your heart and you will find yourself again..."

"But how... you say it so easy, but you know nothing about me... how should I know what to do when everything has changed!"

He started to yell at the older woman who right after placed her finger on his lips as to silence him, Mana had stopped playing and looked at them both, Shinn had frightened her a little by his yelling

"What are you thinking about right now?"

Shinn blinked as he felt a slight blush forming on his cheeks, she had touched his lips, something that still reminded himself of Athrun, he quickly turned his face away from her and stared the other way, he frowned annoyed because of the blush the woman on the other hand laughed as she waited for an answer

"...A... friend..."

"Then go back to him, I'm sure he is worried about you..."

"Why should he... it's not like he would do anything for me... he's just annoying..."

"Would he have been able to stop you?"

"No..."

"Then he is worried about you, that and because your face is telling me differently..."

Shinn pouted his lips and frowned even more, his blush grew deeper and he turned around placing the pan on the table, he said nothing and continued to dry off the dishes

* * *

"Will Angel be alright, Mama?" 

"He will be fine sweetheart..."

The car pulled up near the forest, the dirt road that Shinn had walked on before lay ahead and he looked at it as he stepped out of the vehicle, he turned to the kind woman and her daughter who was sitting in the back once more

"Thank you... for everything..."

"It was nothing... just go..."

Shinn stood up straight and wanted to close the door, but then wondered about something and leaned back towards the woman and child

"Ano... about... the poli-"

"I know, you were never in my house, don't worry..."

Shinn smiled once more and turned to Mana who looked at him saddened

"Bye Mana, be a good girl alright?"

Mana sniffed and whipped her tears away with her sleeve

"Angel, be good as well right?"

"Uhn"

"Bye!"

"Bye..."

With that he stood up straight and closed the passenger door of the car, he turned towards the dirt road and noticed a small light in the distance, he started to walk towards it, not worrying about being cold anymore, he was given a sweater and a pair of slippers

As Shinn set foot towards the house he could help but wonder about what had happened, he had flown...

"That's right... I flew!"

He looked upwards seeing the stars through the branches of the trees but soon turn his gaze back on the road again when he felt another pain sting going through his back

"Well... kinda..."

Sometime later he finally arrived at the house, he sighed and walked up the steps towards the front door, he stood there for a little while...

Was Athrun going to be mad with him... he didn't know... but he was the only person he could turn to at the moment...

Slowly his hand rose up towards the doorbell and he pressed it, he gulped slightly as he heard footsteps going towards the door, he looked at the ground and closed his eyes when it opened, Athrun was probably going to hit him or something... that was what he expected but what he received was nothing, however when he felt warm arms surrounding him he opened his eyes, though he only saw a shoulder and the hallway, he could see that it was nearing midnight

"Don't you ever do that again...!"

He looked surprised, wasn't Athrun going to hit him? Wasn't he angered by his irresponsibility...?

With that he slowly raised one of his hands around Athrun and grabbed Athrun's shoulder, he pressed his face against the shoulder with a sad expression

"I'm sorry..."


	20. Rewrite announcement

**Gundam Seed Destiny: Memory of a dream****  
Writer: Karuma-chan/KarumA****  
Don't own  
This fanfic is set after episode 42**

**

* * *

  
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**Here is an author's note, this story is at the moment being rewritten, some parts will be changed and grammar/spelling will be improved greatly. Sorry for the people who thought this was a new chapter, I myself hate it when authors upload a chapter that is only a note, I apologize for being the kind of ass I myself hate to be.**

**Please feel free to reread the rewritten chapters, though at this time it is only to prologue and first chapter, you can easily see if a chapter is rewritten: all chapter titles will be changed from what they are now to a simple Chapter 1,2,3 etc.**

**Karuma has not died, do not worry nor has she forgotten about her other stories, if you want to know what happened check my profile (which has also been updated, finally)**


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